0117_betty_inset"Golden Girl" Betty White turns 91 years old today!

The funny lady is far from off her rocker -- she's had one of the most successful careers in showbiz, even making a giant comeback in film and on TV just in the last five years!

The hilarious, free-spirited, animal activist (she won't accept a movie role if the script calls for any sort of animal abuse), and 21-time Emmy nominee continues to make us laugh -- have you seen "Off Their Rockers"? Think "Jackass" ... with senior citizens.

But aside from what Betty brings to the silver screen -- we love her, for well, just being herself! In celebration of the "Hot in Cleveland" star's birthday, here are her funniest quotes! You're welcome.

Betty White's funniest quotes:

"That's not what your girlfriend says."

"You gotta use everything you possibly can!" White said this about the slit on her dress when accepting the SAG's Lifetime Achievement Award.

"I have a two-story house and a bad memory, so I’m up and down those stairs all the time. That’s my exercise. "

"I’ve always liked older men. They’re just more attractive to me. Of course, at my age there aren’t that many left! I’ve enjoyed the opposite sex a lot. Always have. Always will."

"Gays love old ladies."

"All creatures must learn to coexist. That's why the brown bear and the field mouse can share their lives in harmony. Of course, they can't mate or the mice would explode."

“Retirement is not in my vocabulary. They aren't going to get rid of me that way.”

“I'm a teenager trapped in an old body.”

"Well ladies, as I used to say to my loving husband, Irving, of 55 years . . . what are you waiting for, stupid? Eat it."

"I'm also on Facebook, and the Twitter."

“Why do people say 'grow some balls?' Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding.”

Check out a behind-the-scenes clip of season 2's "Off Their Rockers" below!

Hot Videos