Stephen Colbert dedicated the majority of his monologue mocking Donald Trump's request for positive news about himself twice a day. The CBS late-night host even worries the president's ego is so big it's going lead to blindness.
"The president, he spends a lot of time on the frowny farm, but he receives a folder full of positive news about himself twice a day," Colbert said. "Positive news about Trump twice a day? Man, he should really share that with the rest of the world."
According to Vice, the folder contains 20-25 pages of ego-boosting articles delivered at 9:30 a.m. and 4:30 p.m. The only criticism these packets have received is, "It needs to be more f--king positive."
"More positive?" Colbert said. "If he loves himself any more, he'll go blind."
The CBS late-night host continued to explain how the White House officials have started to refer to the president's daily delivery as "the propaganda document."
"Now, hold the phone, Chuck," Colbert said. "Propaganda is supposed to brainwash the citizens into loving the leader, not brainwash the leader into loving himself."
But the folder wasn't enough praise so the president also retweeted a Trump supporter's Twitter poll asking users to choose their favorite president between himself and Barack Obama.
The late-night host didn't believe the results with Trump winning 2-to-1 so he decided to poll Trump's performance by breaking out the "sophisticated, highly scientific Elbow-tron 5700." "Who thinks I would be a better president than Donald Trump?" he asked. "Oh my god, the Elbow-Tron has never gone that far before."
Who is a better President of the United States? #ObamaDay— ProgressPolls (@ProgressPolls) August 4, 2017