"He was fired for violating the company's very strict, 27 strikes and you're out rule," jokes James Corden.
Hollywood movie mogul Harvey Weinstein was the target of late-night on Monday with every host chiming in with at least one joke after he was fired from the studio he co-founded in wake of a decades-long pattern of sexual harassment and misconduct.
Here's how each of the shows handled the scandal that's currently blowing up Hollywood.
"Speaking of something you never noticed but was there all along, famed Hollywood producer and human Shrek Harvey Weinstein is a bad person," Stephen Colbert said during his monologue.
"Some of the details of what Weinstein did were terrible," he added. "He apparently required some female employees to be present while he bathed, which explains the job-listing: must type 90 words-per-minute and enjoy vomiting."
"A local reporter in New York said Weinstein forced her to watch him masturbate into a potted plant," he added. "Pro tip: if you ever have dinner at Harvey Weinstein's house, avoid the fresh basil. And after the salad's been served, when he comes around the table, that's not a pepper grinder he's holding."
Colbert also blasted Weinstein's former advisor Lisa Bloom saying Harvey was just "an old dinosaur learning new ways. "A.) That's no excuse. B.) Dinosaurs did not touch themselves in front of the employees. The T-Rex's arms were way too short."
After saying he was "disgusted and shocked" by the news, Seth Meyers turned his show over to three of his female writers, Amber Ruffin, Ally Hord, and Jenny Hagel.
They filmed a sketch showing their reactions to reading Weinstein's apologies, which was filled with WTF-level spit-takes.
They also offered up their advice for how to change things going forward. "Sexual harassment training. Believing women when they come forward with complaints. Also, men could stop being such fucking creeps."
"Note to DJTJ: next time you're defending your father and you think it's a good idea to draw a comparison between him and a freshly-accused sexual predator, don't. It doesn't help," said Kimmel.
He also added this joke: "What's the difference between Harvey Weinstein and the Pillsbury Doughboy? When the Pillsbury Doughboy offers you a roll, he doesn't ask you to watch him take a shower for it."
Jimmy Fallon made one quick quip about the situation in his monologue.
"Harvey Weinstein was fired by his company yesterday for being accused of sexual harassment, not good. They said if he keeps it up he'll wind up with his own show on Fox News" he joked.
James Corden was also quick in his comments on the situation.
"He was fired for violating the company's very strict, 27 strikes and you're out rule," he joked. "Some of the things Harvey Weinstein is accused of, they're very despicable, even Hurricane Harvey is like, dude you're giving me a bad name."
"His behavior left room for only two options: fire him from the Weinstein Company or elect him President of the United States," he added.