Stephen Colbert explains how trickle-down economics (doesn't) work, Seth Meyers points out nothing good happens at 2 a.m. on a Saturday.
Late-night hosts took a look at the tax bill passed through the Senate in the middle of the night over the weekend, which is something they pointed out even the Senators who voted on the bill weren't able to do.
The GOP tax bill was passed at 2 a.m. on Saturday morning by a vote of 51-49, immediately stirring controversy for its tax cuts on the richest Americans, tax increases on lower-earning citizens, and dramatic increase in the nation's debt.
It was a busy weekend in the political world, but it was no surprise that Seth Meyers, Jimmy Fallon, Trevor Noah, and Stephen Colbert took a few moments each on their show to try and break down this tax bill, decipher the scribbled notes in the margins of it and see what it actually says.
They weren't impressed.
'Late Night with Seth Meyers'
Seth Meyers considered the timing of the tax bill's passage, coming in at 2 a.m. Saturday morning, and decided this was quite telling as to how the bill would serve the people. "Try to remember the last time anything good happened to you at 2 a.m. on a Saturday," he said.
"2 a.m. on Saturday is when your drunk friend gets in the back of a police car because he thought it was an Uber and then barfs on himself," Meyers went on. "2 a.m. is when your friend who's into coke says I'm gonna get some more coke."
He did manage to squeeze in another quick joke at the president's expense, before moving onto other things.
"Senate Democrats on Friday criticized Republicans for making last-minute hand-written changes to the tax reform bill hours before there was a vote on it. I can't even read this, said Trump about a different thing," Meyers said as a picture of Donald Trump holding the book "Green Eggs and Ham" appeared behind him.
'The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon'
It took Jimmy Fallon a little longer to get up to speed on the late-breaking news over the weekend. "I tried to follow it on the news, but all the anchors had been fired for sexual harassment," he admitted. "I don't know what's going on."
He also addressed the timing of the bill's passage, imagining the Republican party saying, "We realize doing this in the dead of night makes us look sneaky, corrupt and dishonest. Anyway, have a great weekend."
To help understand some of the hand-written notes Republicans had put on the bill before voting on it, Fallon invited fictional GOP Senator Cory Garnder onto the show to clarify things. According to the parody of a Republican politician, it was quite simple. "It will lower taxes for agropolentelredudicraticvorpulations," he explained calmly. It allows deductions for computer agitated corgi puzzles."
"I'm starting to suspect that you have no clue what the very bill you just signed actually says," Fallon determined.
'Late Show with Stephen Colbert'
Over on "Late Show," Stephen Colbert dug into the meat of the bill -- something Democratic Senators pointed out they didn't really have time to do. "It's called the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act, shortened from the name The Billionaire Stroke-Job Act," he joked, going on to add. "When they said this tax cut would help millions of people, they meant people with millions."
Not to fear, though, the bill hasn't forgotten the middle class. "The Republicans say the bill will lead to a "middle-class miracle," and they're right, because it will be a miracle if we still have a middle class," Colbert explained.
It'll do so through the Reagan-era concept of trickle-down economics.
"If you're not familiar with how trickle-down economics works, that's 'cause it doesn't. Never has," Colbert said, adding that "the bill is unpopular with one segment of the population: people."
'The Daily Show with Trevor Noah'
Trevor Noah was impressed that the Senate passed the bill so quickly in the middle of the night.
"Now that they've finally passed the bill, they might find some down time to read it," he said before beginning to break it down with real numbers revealing how the bill would benefit the rich and increase the tax burden on the middle class and the poor.
"People who decided to be rich instead of poor, good call," he said. "This is gonna be great for you. It's a good choice. More people should make it."
In conclusion, he applauded the Republicans for achieving something with their bill, complete with incomprehensible scribbled notes. "Republicans will finally achieve their two big dreams," he said. "Helping the nation's neediest millionaires and, of course, getting all Americans the 'atterizherbazher' they all deserve."