"Maybe Michael Cohen can pay off my student loans since he’s just giving money away for no specific reason whatsoever," one critic tweets.
After the White House's denial that anyone had paid anyone anything for anything as reports of Donald Trump's alleged affair with Stormy Daniels surfaced, the president's lawyer admitted this week that he had paid porn star $130,000 in the months before the election -- but he paid it out of his own pocket, Trump and his then-campaign team knew nothing about it, and no one reimbursed him.
Twitter's response as Daniels' name once again became a trending topic Tuesday evening through Wednesday morning? "LOL, yeah right."
"Michael Cohen doesn't seem like a very good lawyer," Conan O'Brien sidekick Andy Richter tweeted, while "Westworld" star Jeffrey Wright wanted to know what he paid Daniels for. Former Barack Obama advisor David Axelrod tweeted, "I feel like such a fool. My lawyer makes ME pay HIM!"
In a statement to the New York Times on Tuesday night, attorney Michael Cohen claimed, "In a private transaction in 2016, I used my own personal funds to facilitate a payment of $130,000 to Ms. Stephanie Clifford [Daniels' given name]. Neither the Trump Organization nor the Trump campaign was a party to the transaction with Ms. Clifford, and neither reimbursed me for the payment, either directly or indirectly. The payment to Ms. Clifford was lawful, and was not a campaign contribution or a campaign expenditure by anyone."
The statement is worded in such a way as to specify that those two organizations did not reimburse him, but that certainly leaves open the possibility of reimbursement from some other entity, just as Cohen allegedly used an LLC established out of Deleware to make the payment to Daniels. It is also rather vague about who may or may not have known about the transaction, and what the payment was for. All of that gray area let many on Twitter scratching their heads.
Was Cohen just a great guy who wanted to give Daniels some money? Is he the best wingman an aspiring presidential candidate could ever have? Is he so rich he can afford to pay more than $100k to someone who's lying about an affair with his guy? With a great many questions come a great many tweets, and we've gathered some of the best for you below.
Full statement from Trump lawyer Michael Cohen on his payment to Stormy Daniels: pic.twitter.com/pG2SQkPJ9r— Tarini Parti (@tparti) February 14, 2018
Two questions in one...— Jeffrey Wright (@jfreewright) February 14, 2018
For what? https://t.co/anpQWsWVFG
This is what lawyers are famous for: taking money out of their own pockets and doing things for their totally innocent clients, and then never asking to be reimbursed. "Ehhh don't worry about it!" say lawyers, often, with regards to large amounts of money. https://t.co/vxaPLDamDm— Ken Tremendous (@KenTremendous) February 14, 2018
Michael Cohen doesn't seem like a very good lawyer— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) February 14, 2018
Sooo, the story is that Michael Cohen paid Stormy Daniels $130k out of his own money, so that she wouldn't talk about an affair that didn't happen. pic.twitter.com/IMmiOaCJUX— Johary (@Joharyspark) February 14, 2018
Maybe Michael Cohen can pay off my student loans since he’s just giving money away for no specific reason whatsoever. pic.twitter.com/0HEdHdbqim— Zerlina Maxwell (@ZerlinaMaxwell) February 14, 2018
If you believe Michael Cohen paid Stormy Daniels out of his own pocket...— Seth Abramson (@SethAbramson) February 14, 2018
...no. Not even going to finish that sentence. Too depressing to imagine anyone anywhere is falling for any of this.
Every part of this presidency is depressing and stupid and exhausting and stupid again.
Just a six figure personal payout for a false claim!https://t.co/2fDH2sfjFZ— Chris Cillizza (@CillizzaCNN) February 14, 2018
Fox cable hosts, reporting the story as uncomfortable for the W. H., other real news programs are reporting it as the scandal at the W.H., By the way, is Stormy Daniels our alternative First Lady? Maybe Kellyanne can answer that one for us. pic.twitter.com/80V6LDJfzt— Mary Reed (@marsam22reed) February 14, 2018
So @realDonaldTrump lawyer, Cohen, handed Stormy Daniels $130,000 of his own money for no apparent reason? Was it Save a Poor Porn Star Day?— Jay Que (@JQ4Democracy) February 14, 2018
I feel like such a fool. My lawyer makes ME pay HIM! https://t.co/UoIBGtW6DI— David Axelrod (@davidaxelrod) February 14, 2018
if the Porter fiasco doesn’t go away fast Michael Cohen is gonna call CNN and kidnap a hooker on live TV— Kilgore Trout (@KT_So_It_Goes) February 14, 2018
Just a normal thing that a normal person does for normal, non-cover-up reasons. https://t.co/3AZRStr8sC— ana marie cox (@anamariecox) February 14, 2018
Sometimes one guy has his lawyer pay his adult actress paramour $130K in hush money after she spanks him with a magazine that has his face on it and the lawyer does it and is never reimbursed— Andrew Lawrence (@ndrew_lawrence) February 14, 2018
You know...just normal dude stuff https://t.co/oKWapFgTVr
"Hi, it's me, the lawyer to the president who paid a porn star $130,000 out of my own pocket for reasons I won't explain. I assume there will be no further questions." https://t.co/f3xWlDWxmw— Dave Itzkoff (@ditzkoff) February 14, 2018
So Trump's personal lawyer admitted to the Stormy Daniels payoff, and thought this would *exonerate* him? Who among us hasn't paid six figures to a porn star who is an alleged mistress of a friend?— Topher Spiro (@TopherSpiro) February 14, 2018
I don't care if the $130K came from Michael Cohen's daughter's bat mitzvah bonds, the point of the story is that Trump diddled porn star Stormy Daniels for money while his wife was giving birth to their kid, covered it up, and LIED ABOUT IT!— Jeremy Newberger (@jeremynewberger) February 14, 2018