"If being an asshole was an arcade game, he would have all the top scores," Trevor Noah says.
It was another busy weekend at the White House -- which means late-night hosts had more than enough material on Monday -- with Deputy FBI Director Andrew McCabe getting fired two days before he was set to retire on his 50th birthday, thus taking away his pension, and Donald Trump calling out Robert Mueller by name for the first time in a tweet.
What they saw was a president gleefully tearing down someone he saw as a threat to his administration in McCabe, and possibly setting the stage for his next big firing in the form of Robert Mueller. Like Comey and McCabe before him, Trump first called them out in a series of tweets seeking to undermine their integrity and character. With this latest tweet, Mueller and his special counsel investigation into Russian collusion in the 2016 election appear to be highest on Trump's radar.
'Late Night with Seth Meyers'
"Crazy shit happens so fast in this presidency it sometimes feels like I'm binge-watching it," Meyers said, trying to keep up with everything that went down over the weekend. He broke it down in his "A Closer Look" segment, examining first the abrupt firing of FBI Deputy Director Andrew McCabe two days before he was set to retire, thus taking away his pension.
Meyers recalled a tweet from December, where Trump called out McCabe's pending retirement, saying he was "racing the clock to retire with full benefits." Of course, Trump put a stop to that, but Meyers couldn't help noticing something else. "He's racing the clock?" he said to the president. "You're the one who's freaking out like a Final Jeopardy contestant who knows the music is about to stop."
McCabe is the second top FBI official fired who subsequently revealed that he'd taken notes and memos of his conversations with the president. "Trump's such an idiot. He keeps firing dudes who take meticulous notes," Meyers said. "And something tells me when you compare Comey's and McCabe's notes side by side, they're gonna match up." With this, he threw up a graphic of two memos reading, "This dude is cray."
'The Late Show with Stephen Colbert'
With Trump mentioning Robert Mueller for the first time over the weekend, Stephen Colbert felt like this is the opening salvo in an effort to further discredit Mueller's investigation and ultimately fire him.
"It really feels like Trump is gearing up to fire Special Counsel -- and guy wondering how much he'll get for his book deal -- Robert Mueller," Colbert said. "This past Saturday, Trump's attorney -- and shaved Peter Pettigrew -- John Dowd called for the immediate shut down of the special counsel probe into Russian interference in the 2016 election."
Colbert pointed out that Andrew McCabe had already been under investigation by the Inspector General, "so to avoid looking like he's trying to shut down the Russia investigation, all Trump had to do was not dance on McCabe's grave." But of course, that didn't happen. Instead Trump tweeted, "Andrew McCabe FIRED, a great day for the hard working men and women of the FBI -- a great day for Democracy. Sanctimonious James Comey was his boss and made McCabe look like a choir boy. He knew all about the lies and corruption going on at the highest levels of the FBI!"
"This is a sitting president of the United States gloating about firing a respected career FBI official and smearing another FBI official whose firing led to the appointment of the special counsel," Colbert marveled. "And none of that shocks me as much as the fact that he spelled sanctimonious correctly. I think he was trying to spell saxophone."
'The Late Late Show with James Corden'
James Corden took particular note of the president's tweet reading, "The Mueller probe should never have been started in that there was no collusion and there was no crime. It was based on fraudulent activities and a Fake Dossier paid for by Crooked Hillary and the DNC, and improperly used in FISA COURT for surveillance of my campaign. WITCH HUNT!"
Corden followed up the tweet by musing, "Let's see, wildly unrestrained, check; semicoherent, check; tweet that ends in all caps, check. Guys, it's official, Donald Trump is on spring break!"
He went on to add, "This is the first time Trump has attacked Mueller by name. So you know what that means? It means after months of practice, Trump finally learned how to spell Mueller."
Corden also took note of how often the president has used the term "Witch Hunt" in the last year, totaling 24 mentions. "Or as they'll soon be called: Exhibit A, Exhibit B, Exhibit C, Exhibit D," Corden said.
'The Daily Show with Trevor Noah'
Over on Comedy Central, Trevor Noah had little trouble theorizing why Trump fired McCabe. "He's got info on the Comey firing, he was part of the Russia investigation, he knows that Trump bought a sex doll shaped like himself and then tried to deduct it as a business expense," Noah said.
He then pointed out that Trump purportedly didn't limit his insults against McCabe to Twitter, even going so far as to lash out at the former deputy FBI director needlessly over the telephone. "Ask your wife how it feels to be a loser," Trump reportedly told McCabe at one point in a fit of rage over Comey. McCabe's wife had run and lost a bid for Senate.
"I'm sorry, but Donald Trump is a proper asshole. If being an asshole was an arcade game, he would have all the top scores," Noah concluded. "He's mad at Comey so he insults McCabe's wife because she ran for a Senate seat and lost. That's so messed up. Especially since Trump should know what it's like to have a wife that wants to run."
He then concluded that Mueller needs to be on high alert. "Trump is going after Mueller by name for the first time," Noah said. "So Robert Mueller, I don't know when your next birthday is, but something tells me the president may be planning a surprise."