Nikki's doubts about Cena aren't going away as wedding date approaches.
During Sunday night's "Total Bellas" -- part deux of her Parisian bachelorette extravaganza -- Nikki continued down her spiral of voicing concerns about John and their upcoming wedding. While at her "incredible" masquerade party (put on by her sister Brie Bella), Nikki told her friends that she's over making sacrifices for her groom-to-be.
"I guess I'm just over sacrificing, but then he now has sacrificed so much for me," Nikki said. "I'm over that word and over the feeling and over that's just been my past five and a half years, just over it."
"It's crazy what can happen in a year like John didn't want kids, but then you know he called the wedding off and then did that make him want kids?" she continued in a confessional. "Does he really not want kids? And then he'll make comments at times and it's weird because I think we try to control our emotions, but honestly you can't like I can't control how I'm feeling about everything now and so I feel like I'm still in shock."
After seeing her sister sad, Brie knew she needed to liven up the party, which included extravagant masks, lavish gowns, and French strippers.
"You know it's crazy because there's certain conversations that can really change a mood and like always, bring up the word sacrifice and it can really piss her off," Brie said in a confessional. "I'm not gonna let this conversation damper the mood so no better way to keep the party going than some opera."
Brie, who along with her sister-in-law Lauren Garcia, pulled off the incredible event all within a short amount of time. Although Nikki might of had her concerns about her relationship, the party was still a huge success.
"I feel like I'm truly now having my bachelorette party like I'm on my way to get married," Nikki said. "I'm on my way to become Mrs. Cena and that dream I had as a little girl, it's coming soon."
Bachelorette Party Blues
Although Nikki ended up enjoying her bachelorette party overall, she continued to express her worries about John throughout the trip.
The WWE star told Lauren that after her and John first called off the wedding, they vowed to spend more time together. However, that didn't go too well for them.
"So when he had a week off last week, he expected me to be around the whole time," Nikki explained to her sister-in-law. "And I gave him every morning and evening and it was weird how we were getting like how we were getting irritated with each other and so I was like 'oh my gosh Nicole now what have you done? Like you made this big deal' and I just realized now I'm the opposite like I think because it's been so long."
Nikki explained that the closer the wedding date approaches, the more that "deep feelings" from her relationship are starting to surface.
"The closer and closer I'm getting to the wedding, the more these deep feelings that I've had over the past six years are coming to the surface," she said in a confessional. "So even with the bachelorette, it's hard to really enjoy any of this."
While at high tea with her pals, Nikki explained that wedding planning has caused her and John to "grow more apart."
"Every little part of this wedding, it's like, it's going back," Nikki said to her friends. "I feel like I'm continuing to grow more apart from John, and I should be growing closer to him," she says in the clip.
As always, her twin Brie -- and maid of honor -- attempted to make Nikki feel better and everything has been such a "rollercoaster."
"But you're finally like telling people what you want," one of Nikki's best friends said. "And that's the best part."
"You're finally being honest," Brie added.
But Nikki didn't want to tell her friends all of her concerns just yet.
"It's hard when my girls start saying how they love how open and honest I've been in my relationship and how much more I've been using my voice," Nikki said in a confessional. "But I don't want to ruin anyone's weekend and they're all here for me, so even though I'm feeling all these emotions, I just think I want to keep this to myself for a bit longer. As long as I can, at least."
We'll have to see how it all ends during the "Total Bellas" mid-season finale next Sunday at 9/8c on E!