"Because the House bill is so mean and so unpopular, Senate Republicans are left with two options: Either fix what's in the bill or just hide it from everyone," Noah said in the segment (above). "Republican senators are so ashamed of the health care bill they're working on, they're actually putting it inside a porn magazine so no one will know what they're reading ... Now according to Republicans the stories of them being 'shady,' writing the spill-in secrets, these are all fake news. For the truth we need to go to the ancient tree who leads them."
The comedian then proceeded to comment on McConnell denying secret meetings GOP is having about the bill. "Nobody's hiding the ball here," the Kentucky senator has said, adding, “Our goal is to move forward quickly."
"Shouldn't your goal be to make a good health care system?" Noah said. "Shouldn't it be about doing it right, not doing it fast? I mean, you'd think of all people Mitch McConnell would know about The Tortoise and The Hare. His cousin won that race. But he is hiding the ball, there's no mistaking that."
The Comedy Central host then played clips of Senate Democrats claiming they have no idea what is going on in terms of health care, a process that Noah thinks should be open and active so people can contribute to create a bill that works for everyone.
Noah pointed out that here has been some obvious back and forth on the health care bill, sharing that Trump went from once calling it an "unbelievable victory" to most recently calling it "mean" and a "son of a bitch."
"Damn. The bill went from 'unbelievable' to a 'son of a bitch?' Or in Trump terms, it went from an Ivanka to an Eric," Noah joked.
While reflecting on Obamacare, Noah said though not perfect, it was created the proper way, without any shady or private meetings.
"The truth is Obamacare isn't perfect, but at least when Senate Democrats passed their initial bill in 2009 they worked on it for 11 months and held over a dozen open meetings, but even with all of that, Republicans still complained that with something so big as reforming the American healthcare system, the Democrats were moving too fast and being too secretive," Noah said.
"You'll never guess which Republican complained the most," Noah said, then flashed a 2009 clip of none other than McConnell claiming Obamacare was moving too quickly and created under complete secrecy.