According to the article, since Melania Trump and the president don't live together, the Donald lacks someone to help him decompress from the daily grind of watching "Fox & Friends," rage-tweeting, golfing and being the most presidential president in the history of presidents. So he and Hannity gab each night "like old girlfriends about media gossip and whose show sucks," according to the article.
"They're like the Gayle and Oprah of angry, old white men," Colbert described the pair.
He then imagined their flirtatious banter, with Trump saying, "Sean, what are you wearing? I'm wearing nothing but a cheeseburger wrapper. I'll never get the smell of onions out now."
After noting the part in the article about the duo gossiping about "whose shows suck," Colbert crossed his fingers and said, "I hope it's me! I would love to be up there with low-rated 'Morning Joe,' unfunny 'SNL,' and lyin' 'Spongebob Squarepants.'"
What was perhaps most alarming, though, was the article's assertion that the president has abandoned all other sources of news other than Fox News because his staffers have found him easier to manage that way, calling it a "complete dosage of Fox." Colbert joked, "Side effects may include decreased worldview, verbal diarrhea and Lou Dobbs disease. Remember, if your Tucker Carlson lasts more than four hours, it's because he's a dick."
"The Late Late Show with James Corden"
"Just when you thought Trump couldn't be more in love with Fox News," Corden said, marveling at Trump's apparent night-time conversations. "You just know that they end every phone call like, 'You hang up first. No, no, no, you hang up. No, no, you hang up. ... Well you didn't hang up, either!'
He then made a callback to Trump's recent tweet about China trade negotiations where he urged Americans to "be cool, it will all work out."
Corden joked, "Reports say that when he's really upset, Hannity is always there with those reassuring words that Trump wants to hear: 'Be cool. It will all work out.'"
"Late Night with Seth Meyers"
Meyers didn't spend a lot of time on the topic during his monologue, nor did he delve into what the relationship might look like. Instead, he went with a more traditional "old people" joke.
"Fox News host Sean Hannity speaks with President Trump on the phone most nights after Hannity's show is over," Meyers told his audience. Then, after a beat, he added, "As opposed to Trump, who speaks with Hannity while the show is still going on."
Meyers then threw up a graphic of Trump sitting in front of a TV with Hannity on it, slipping into his Trump voice so he could mimic the president shouting at the TV. "Sean! Sean! Why aren't you resp-- Sean!"