T-shirt time commenced almost immediately, and the boys headed out for their first night unsupervised. It didn't take very long before their VIP booth "flooded with women," as Pauly so nicely put it. One, in particular, looked like "Sammi Sweetheart Jr." -- and he was down.
"She did not look like Sammi!" Ron said during his confessional. "Sammi was way hotter. I have way better taste than that. There's no way she looks like Sammi. No, definitely not."
Despite Ronnie's visible and audible disapproval, Pauly ended up bringing mini Sammi home with him.
"She can't sleep with him," Ronnie mumbled to himself while Pauly was upstairs undressing a girl Ron refused to believe looked like his ex. "That's like disrespecting me. F-ck my feelings. She don't even look nothing like Sammi. Maybe the first night I was here, she might've."
After a brief pause, a light bulb went off in Ron's head. "Ohhh, that's what I've gotta do," he said as he pulled up the number of a taxi service.
Before Pauly and mini Sammi's half-dressed makeout sesh could turn into anything steamier, Ronnie called her a cab home.
"Ronnie's clearly over Sammi," Vinny later joked. "Not jealous at all. Yeah, right."
Later on, Mike and Ronnie engaged in yet another epic roast. The two went back and forth taking hysterical jabs at each other until they finally hugged it out. No winner was crowned, but that gave Pauly -- the self-proclaimed "prank-war champion" -- an epic idea.
"Mike's transformed into this nice guy," Pauly said. "He's almost like too nice. Us guidos, we like to f-ck with each other, so I have an idea to see if he really changed."
Pauly then called up Season 1 nemesis Angelina Pivarnick and asked if she'd be willing to fly in to "surprise" Mike. Even though she and Mike had quite the tumultuous past, Angelina agreed. She said she wanted a chance to "redeem" herself.
Pauly then broke the news to Ronnie and Vinny, who -- by the way -- refer to Angelina as "The Staten Island Dump."
"This is a prank war, and Pauly is like a kamikaze pilot just taking everyone out with Angelina's ass," Vinny said. "I totally have a love-hate for this prank. It's like setting off fireworks inside the house. It's the most epic prank ever, so I'm happy about it, but I'm also terrified. The best part about Angelina coming here is seeing their reactions. I mean, Mike -- his jaw is gonna drop. And the girls -- they always look surprised because of their surgeries, but Angelina is actually gonna make JWoww's eyebrows move. That's how shocking it is."
To refresh your memory, the last time the group was in Miami, Angelina and Snooki got into a physical fight, Angelina slapped Pauly across the face, and Jenni hurled her famous phrase -- "You can stay, get your ass beat" -- numerous times at Angelina. It was all truly legendary reality television.
So you can imagine the look of utter disbelief on Mike's face when he answered the door thinking it was the girls who had come back from Jersey.
"You still think I'm a dirty little hamster?!" Angelina barked at Mike as she made her way through the front door of their Miami mansion. The guys nearly pissed themselves with excitement, fear, anticipation and laughter as they watched Mike's reaction.
After picking his mouth up off the floor and collecting himself, Mike sat down at the dinner table and had a surprisingly civil conversation with Angelina. All was going well until she asked him why he blocked her on Twitter.
Turns out Angelina told a tabloid Mike had a "small peesh," and Mike didn't like that. (For the record, they never actually had sex.)
On that note, next week's episode is bound to be absolutely insane because the girls come back from Jersey to find Angelina sitting at their dining room table.
"Jersey Shore: Family Vacation" airs Thursdays at 8 p.m. on MTV.