The Big Apple's finest went speed dating on Wednesday night's "Real Housewives of New York," and we are living for every minute of it.
Carole Radziwill rounded up the troops to attend the event put on by one of her friends. Although Dorinda Medley and Tinsley Mortimer were both in relationships, they went along for support -- and wound up getting a free show.
Dorinda Medley Details Her Issues with 'RHONY' Costars Sonja Morgan and Bethenny Frankel on 'WWHL'
View StoryOne of Carole's dates told her he had three kids, and she "swiped left" immediately. Chanteuse Luann de Lesseps' date said he had no idea what cabaret was, so he got the boot, too.
Ramona, on the other hand, was killing it -- batting her eyelashes and giggling at just the right times. She was seemingly hitting it off with a 44-year-old stud in a red scarf named Brian. He was stunned to learn she was 61, and when he said she looked his age, she grabbed his face and planted a kiss right on his lips.
But Brian had his sights set elsewhere. He already met Bethenny Frankel a few times in the past and had been crushing on her ever since, so when he got his three minutes with the Skinnygirl mogul, he was pumped.
"You're too far away from me," Brian said to Bethenny upon sitting down in front of her.
"Would you like me to give you a blowjob or something?" Bethenny joked. "What would you like to happen?"
"Can I come sit next to you?" Brian asked after picking his mouth up off the floor following her remark. "Honestly, the only reason I did this was thinking that you would be here. I did it for no other reason than to come spend time with you."
Bethenny was flattered and asked Brian how jealous he was going to be when his three minutes with her were up.
'RHONY' Bad Apple of the Week: Explosive Dinner Ignites All-Out Screaming Match Among Every Cast Member
View Story"I just hope I make such a good impression that you say, 'You know that guy, Brian? What a good guy!'" he replied.
Elsewhere, Sonja Morgan was showing one of her dates how to properly spank. He grabbed her head, leaned in and whispered, "I've got the cat of nine tails, and you'd be tied up, f--king helpless. And when you're done, you'd have hand marks on your f--king ass."
Sonja's response: "Oh, my God -- I love hand marks the next day!" Class act.
But the best part came after the speed dating, when the guy Ramona thought she had hit it off with -- Brian -- found Bethenny to continue chatting.
While Bethenny and Brian were talking, Ramona went to the bar to get him a drink.
'Real Housewives of New York' Boat Ride from Hell, Brutal Vacation Fights Light Up Explosive Trailer
View Story"Bethenny thinks that he likes her," a man at the bar warned Ramona, to which she replied, "I don't really care who he likes. He brought me a drink, so I wanted to bring him a drink."
Ramona walked right over to where Bethenny and Brian were sitting and handed him a drink. Bethenny was stunned but kept her composure -- until it came time for her confessional.
Watch Bethenny's priceless imitation of Ramona in the clip above.
"The Real Housewives of New York" airs Wednesdays at 9 p.m. on Bravo.