"That's how happy I'm gonna be next year when I find somebody. I can't wait to find a guy to raise your child the way you can't," Jen Harley's texts supposedly said.
This week's "Jersey Shore: Family Vacation" was part 400 of the Ronnie-Jen saga, as things got even uglier -- if you can believe it.
This week showed that Ron actually behaved himself and didn't sleep with Jewish Barbie. Good job, Ron. Maybe that really bizarre pep-talk to yourself did the trick?
"And there goes my life," cameras caught him saying to himself in the bathroom. "Not gonna be good. Nothing about this is good. Nothing good can come from this. Ever. Ever. Ever. Ever. Ever. I can't. I can't."
Ron finally left the bathroom and went downstairs to smoke a cigarette on the porch. By this point, it was already morning. His phone kept going off, and it was obvious he was having issues with his baby mama, Jen Harley.
After a while, Ron made his way upstairs to where Angelina and Jenni "JWoww" Farley were just waking up. Jewish Barbie had slid into Angelina's bed and told her Ronnie was very sweet to her and didn't try anything.
"How many hours of sleep did you get?" Angelina asked Ron.
"None," he said. "Dealin' with drama. Apparently, I'm single 'cause she's crazy. She's very disrespectful, telling me, 'I can't wait to find a guy to raise your child the way you can't.' Sending me screenshots of f--king Sam and her new boyfriend, saying, 'That's how happy I'm gonna be next year when I find somebody.' Super disrespectful." The girls were speechless.
Ronnie and Angelina eventually escorted Jewish Barbie out to a cab, then made their way to the porch to continue their conversation.
"She was saying f--ked up shit," Ronnie told Angelina. "She tries to say anything that she knows will really hurt me. She knows how I feel about the baby, so she knows the second she says something like that, I get like..."
"Why would she send you pictures of Sam with her boyfriend?" Angelina interrupted. "That's like hitting low. Real low."
Ronnie simply replied, "I'm not gonna stay with someone who says, 'I'm gonna find the guy that's gonna raise your daughter better than you.'"
The other roommates were pretty much over Jen and over the drama. But Angelina -- who hasn't been subjected to it as much -- was completely shocked and disgusted. (You're late to this party, Ang.)
Ronnie eventually went to sleep -- for the entire day and night. The roommates tried to get him to go to dinner with them, but he wouldn't budge.
During the meal, Pauly D joked, "I would do anything for a Ron and Sam fight right now." And honestly, he's got a point. Those fights made that relationship look healthy compared to this dumpster fire.
Later on, Angelina had a few noteworthy moments of her own. For starters, she told Jenni her grandmother is a psychic and told her she felt Jenni would be divorcing her husband, Roger Mathews. At the time that this episode was filmed, Jenni had not yet filed for divorce.
Jenni's response was a major red flag. "I mean, I always talk about it," she said without batting an eyelash. "When do I not say that?"
"Bitch, you get a 'divorce' like every f--king week," Nicole said. "That's what I'm saying. Welcome to relationships." Jenni added. The whole conversation was quite bleak -- and a little weird.
Also quite bleak and a little weird was the way Angelina spoke about her fiancé, Chris. She's admittedly always thought Pauly was hot, so when he chatted her up during dinner, she was left smitten.
In the cab ride on the way home, she confessed to the girls she was "ecstatic" that "the king" had noticed her "enormous breasts."
"The kind of what?" Jenni demanded.
"The king of guidos!" Angelina said.
"The king in your life is your man," Jenni replied.
"My fiancé's the king of the garbage men," Angelina fired back. The girls were shocked.
Jenni even said during her confessional that Angelina "might as well go on to her fourth engagement 'cause this shit ain't gonna last."
"Jersey Shore: Family Vacation" airs Thursdays at 8 p.m. on MTV.
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