At the end of the hour, the weakest performer of the bunch was revealed to be Pittsburgh Steelers WR Antonio Brown, who sang Bobby Brown's "My Prerogative" while dressed as a hippo. Yeah, it's a wild show.
We're breaking down the most promising social media guesses for each of the remaining five performers below, starting with the proud Peacock.
During this singer's introduction package, he revealed a "love of the spotlight," adding that he had been performing since he was five. The judges noted the "Vegas vibes" coming from the video, as he also said he'd be considered a heartthrob for a lot of moms out there.
This performer also called Michael Jackson a "dear friend" and considers himself to be a "showman." His song of choice reflected that, as he sang "The Greatest Show" from "The Greatest Showman," leading Jenny McCarthy to guess that it could actually be Hugh Jackman.
LOL. Sure. Whatever, you say, Jenny.
Scherzinger said she got "magician vibes" from him as well, prompting her to ask if he's ever been part of a magic act. "I have never been mauled by a tiger, but I have been part of a magic act," he revealed. That led Jeung to guess Teller of Penn and Teller.
The best guess for this one though is Donny Osmond. The longtime performer was easily considered a heartthrob back in the day, made his TV debut on The Andy Williams Show when he was five, has a history with MJ and performed in Vegas. Also, just listen to that voice!
This blue guy said he dressed as a monster "because that's what the world labeled me."
"I'm here to rewrite my mix tape to prove I'm more than just puff and fluff," he added in his intro, adding that he "retreated into my cave" for a break from the public eye after "the game turned on me."
The judges seemed to think those clues meant he did some hard time, while Thicke thought he was an older gentleman. When asked if he was a professional singer, the monster replied, "Not to everyone."
The biggest fan theory here is T-Pain, who famously used autotune to the extreme, something which both made him popular and vilified in the industry.
The tweets about him possibly being the creature got back to the artist, who tweeted during the madness last night:
What in God's name is everybody tweeting me about?!?!
This pretty princess said she "grew up in one of the richest neighborhoods," but was told at a young age that she was "tone deaf." She added that she's used to being told she "wasn't worthy," before singing Rachel Platten's "Fight Song."
"She's so beautiful and regal. It's Meghan Markle," guessed Scherzinger (which, could you imagine?!). Thicke rightly noted that she "doesn't sound like a trained singer," before McCarthy guessed Paris Hilton or Ireland Baldwin. The unicorn also said "they call me 'bird,'" whoever "they" are.
Paris Hilton was a popular guess online, but we have a feeling none of the names the judges are throwing out will actually be hiding under these masks.
Tori Spelling's name, however, was all over the place on Twitter and in the performance's YouTube comments. She, of course, grew up in Beverly Hills and starred on "90210," before becoming a tabloid fixture.
This guy had "athlete" written all over him. During his intro package he said he's "incredibly competitive" and has been "knocked down many times." He made a reference to Ravens and the wild, wild west, leading to some football guesses from the judges. He was also seen taping up his hands in the video, causing some MMA or WWE fighter speculation as well.
"To me, that sounds like either an athlete or a wrestler, I'm thinking Stone Cold Steve Austin," said Thicke, before McCarthy guessed Chuck Liddell. When the deer noted that he loves "horses," Thicke guessed maybe he plays for the Denver Broncos.
Thicke also asked if he'd ever played in the NFL, which the deer responded to by saying he "would have to take the fifth on that."
Even being altered, his voice definitely sounded like Terry Bradshaw, one of the most popular guesses online. Second to Bradshaw was Peyton Manning.
The last (and best) singer of the night was ready to roar. The female singer said she leapt at the chance "for people to see me perform without any preconceived notions of who I am." She added that she's from "Hollywood royalty" and a "pride" filled with "lots of women.
McCarthy ridiculously guessed Lady Gaga, which, no. Thicke assumed she was a "well-trained performer," before the judges guessed she was maybe trying to break free from a girl group. That led to speculation she could be from the Pussycat Dolls (something Nicole shot down), Destiny's Child or Fifth Harmony.
The "Hollywood royalty" line led to many guesses for Rumer Willis, daughter of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore. She also has four sisters and a lion tattoo, making it all line up. Willis is also a pretty great singer and has a history of doing cabaret and stage shows.