“I just got sick of being mean to myself," the pop star said ahead of her new album.
Kesha is ready for the pop star spotlight again with her upcoming album to be released in December.
And the 32-year-old singer/songwriter is "healthier than ever" after years of struggling with an eating disorder, mental illness, and the ongoing legal battle with music producer Dr. Luke (real name Lukasz Gottwald).
"There was a time where it was really dark, and now I really am so happy, and that's why I want to make happy songs. And as a distraction from the bullshit that's going on. I want to inspire joy," the Grammy-nominee said in an interview with Billboard.
But the transformation was quite a long journey as she struggled with various issues to do with the music industry when she first started out in her career over 10 years ago. The performer, whose real name is Kesha Rose Sebert, was "under the impression that to do this job, you don't eat, you don't sleep, you don't have privacy, and you don't have time for yourself," she told the publication.
And she was her own worst critic. "I would talk to myself in a way I would never talk to another human being in a million f--king years."
However, following years of therapy and a trip to rehab in 2014, Kesha formed a new outlook on life, one that embraced her mental and physical well-being.
"I just got sick of being mean to myself. I'm not starving myself for shit anymore. I'm too old for that. Been there, done that, it sucked, almost killed me, no thank you," she explained. "I turned 30, I got an ass, and I'm OK with it!"
In 2014, Kesha filed a civil lawsuit against Gottwald, claiming he abused her "physically, sexually, verbally and emotionally over a 10-year period". Denying the allegations, he sued her for defamation and breach of contract in the amount of $50 million. In 2016, Kesha dropped the abuse claims while Gottwald's suit is still pending a court date.
The Los Angeles native said her attorneys advised her not to speak about the lawsuit. "They're just like, 'Focus on the music, focus on your happiness and mental health, and we'll deal with this'. Doing that has been greatly helpful," she relayed to Billboard.
And the focus has allowed Kesha to get back to her catchy pop tune roots, like when she won over fans with 2010's "Animal" and her breakout hit "Tik Tok".
"I dug through the emotional wreckage, and now... I can go back to talking a little bit of shit," she said. "I really wanted to put a solid footprint back into pop music, like, 'I can do this, and I can do this on my own.' I don't know if this is my last pop record, but I want to have one where I go out with a bang."
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