"There's days where I'm like, 'I'm not going to church, I don't believe in this stuff anymore.'"
"The testing of your faith produces perseverance," so says James 1:3 in the Bible. And Jax Taylor is one to know, having considered turning his back on the church following a spate of family deaths.
However, the "Vanderpump Rules" star, who most recently lost his beloved aunt at the age of just 55, insisted he still believes there's a greater plan.
"I just lost a lot of family over the last three years," he said. "Dad, two uncles, couple friends, now my aunt... It is what it is, you know, it's life. It sucks. It just sucks."
The reality star said he had never even experienced death until three years ago; then his whole mother's side got taken out by cancer.
"I was very fortunate that none of my family members had passed away," he said. "After my dad went, it was just, you know... they all went."
"You just gotta keep hope, keep faith, I guess," he continued. "It's hard, you start to question your faith, and your beliefs. Losing so many people that should not have left, there's other people that should have gone before them, especially people who live doing everything the right way and then they die at such an early age."
Jax said his dad was only 59 when he died, while the rest of the family members he lost were all only in their mid-fifties.
"Just way too young," he lamented. "You just gotta have some kind of faith, but I tell you what, it's a struggle. I'm big into church and stuff, and there's days where I'm like, 'I'm not going to church, I don't believe in this stuff anymore.'"
But he added: "But then I wake up and I'm like 'No, there's a plan. There's gotta be a plan.' You have to have some kind of hope. I'm trying... I'm trying."