E!/Instagram
"I'm sure a certain someone will come crawling back after she compares her POOSH check to her E! check," writes Nori's Black Book.
The woman behind Nori's Black Book -- a viral parody Instagram account written entirely in the voice of Kim Kardashian's sassy 6-year-old daughter -- is bringing her talents to TooFab.
Each week, "Nori" recaps new episodes of "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" and gives us HER take on all the family drama.
(NOTE: The below was not actually written by North West.)
Sunday's season finale of "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" started with Kris telling Khloe, Kim, Kourtney and Scott that she had been feeling frustrated and anxious about how everything had been going lately, so she planned a trip to Wyoming for the family. Everyone agreed to just be together without the kids and other distractions. Kris explained she wanted to press a reset button to get everyone back on track.
Kylie and Scott ended up canceling on the trip last minute, but the rest of the family still wanted to make the best of it. Kourtney ended up bringing her kids because they'd never been to Wyoming before.
I have a second home in Wyoming, so I was not interested in going on this trip. I also feel like everyone else is the problem, not me. When it's my days to film, I come on time and share a lot on camera. I also needed everyone out of town so I could meet with E! about my potential spin-off show without anyone knowing. -NW
When the family arrived in Wyoming, they visited a family friend's house for dinner. Kendall arrived at the house and was annoyed that Kylie decided not to come on the trip. She felt that she took a lot of her time and came all the way from London, so Kylie could've flown two hours to be there.
Auntie Kylie is running a billion-dollar company. She doesn't have time to toss around horse shoes with Auntie Kendall in Wyoming. Maybe if Auntie Kendall had a business that she was passionate about then she would know what it takes to run a business. -NW
The next day, the family went on a cattle drive to learn how to better communicate with each other. Kris felt that if they could do a cattle drive, they could do "KUWTK."
On the ride over, Kris wanted everyone to reveal the person in the van with whom they wanted to strengthen their relationship. Khloe wanted to strengthen her relationship with Kourtney because she said they sometimes fizzle. Kendall wanted everyone to stop being so judgmental and made sure to point out that Kourtney also judges. And Kim also wanted to fix her relationship with Kourtney because she admitted that they can both be really mean.
If I had to say who in the family I want to strengthen my relationship with, I would say Uncle Rob. I don't really know him, and every time I see him, he asks me for a loan. -NW
After the cattle drive, Khloe and Kendall talked about Kylie not coming on the trip. They thought it was stupid that she didn't come because it was only two hours away and for two days of her life. Khloe was just happy that Kendall came even though she had to fly in from Europe.
The next day, Kris organized a ropes course for the family. The cattle drive didn't involve much teamwork and communication, so Kris hoped the ropes course would better help them in those departments.
Kim went first, but she is deathly afraid of heights, so she started crying and announced she wasn't doing it. The other girls completed the course. When it was Kris' turn, Khloe tried to cheer her on. However, Kourtney teased Khloe that she didn't finish the course and therefore shouldn't be cheering on Kris. Khloe called her out, and an argument erupted. Kourtney told her that she was just joking with her, but Khloe insisted that Kourtney was being a bully.
Nothing good comes from this family doing outside activities. Our team building exercises should've been a spa day and lunch at Nobu. Ropes course? Cattle drive? We aren't Jenners! -NW
When the family returned to the house, Kourtney texted Kendall that she was leaving Wyoming. When Kendall went to ask Kourtney why she was leaving, she she said it was because everyone always picks on her and she felt defeated after Khloe lashed out at her at the ropes course. She said everyone was taking things personally (including herself) and that it was not enjoyable to hang out. Kendall said she understood because she feels like the odd one out all the time, but she wanted Kourtney to stay and work it out. Kourtney agreed to stay and hoped that things would get better.
Auntie Kourt texted me and asked if I could send a plane to come get her from Wyoming. I told her absolutely not but let her know I had some points on Southwest Airlines that she and her kids could use. It's amazing what Auntie Kourt can tolerate when you suggest flying commercial. -NW
Since the ropes course was a bust, Kris thought it would be a better idea to just sit and talk about their issues and how they could make their relationships better. Kris thought that if they continued to work together and try to be respectful of each other's needs, they could carry on filming the show. Kourtney added that everyone needed to be respectful of each other's boundaries and recognize that what's okay for one person might not be okay for her. Kim told her that if everyone acted like that, they would have no show. Kris reiterated that they should continue doing the show as long as everyone was happy, but Kourtney said she was reaching her breaking point of no longer being happy filming her life with her family.
"It's not okay that I feel like I'm at my breaking point," she said at one point. "I need a break and I don't want to film anymore."
In the confessionals, Kim said she heard what Kourtney was saying and wanted her to be happy. She hoped that Kourtney would find clarity in whatever decision she decided to make. Khloe thought Kourtney needed to do whatever was best for her but noted it felt like they were beating a dead horse. She thought they needed to move on.
I reached my breaking point with Auntie Kourt two seasons ago. I've been begging the network for a recast. I think Jeannie Mai could pull off the role of "Kourtney." -NW
Kendall called Kylie to let her know that she was upset she wasn't in Wyoming. Kylie said she had to take Stormi to Houston to be with Travis. Kylie said she felt bad for missing the trip because she didn't know how much it meant to Kendall for her to be there. Kendall said she understood and was looking forward to spending some quality time with her sister back in L.A.
I really hope Chicago doesn't grow up to be as needy as Auntie Kendall. She can take that to Saint or Sam, but I'm telling you right now, I won't have the time for it. -NW
The last night in Wyoming, Kris thought it would be funny if everyone came to dinner dressed up as a family member. Khloe dressed up as Kris, Kourtney dressed up as Kim, Kris dressed up as Khloe, Kendall and Penelope dressed up as Kylie, and Kim dressed up as Kourtney. Everyone's impression was spot on and hilarious. Kris loved everyone's sense of humor and that everyone was able to come together and make fun of each other in the most lighthearted way. Kris was optimistic about the future and the future of the show.
I can honestly say I loved this segment! I thought it was especially great that Auntie Kendall dressed up as present-day Auntie Kylie, and Penelope dressed up as the Auntie Kylie who dated Tyga.
This season was full of ups, downs and uncertainties. I love filming this show and working with my family, but if others are unhappy, they are free to explore other opportunities. I'm sure a certain someone will come crawling back after she compares her POOSH check to her E! check. -NW
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