LaLa unloads on Raquel ... before Katie and Schwartz have incredibly awkward fight in front of everyone.
Tuesday's "Vanderpump Rules" was filled with what should have been drama-free festivities, but they almost all ended in nasty fights instead.
Katie Maloney came up with the lovely idea to throw a wine night at her house, inviting all the Sur girls over to toss back some vino. Nearly every woman in the show's cast was invited over, except for Kristen Doute, who has been on the outs with both Maloney and Stassi Schroeder all season. Kristen later found out about the party, but nobody seemed to care how bummed she was besides Scheana Shay and Brittany Cartwright.
Raquel Leviss was surprised to get an invitation, saying Katie's never gone out of her way to be intentionally kind to her in the past. And with LaLa Kent -- who sparred with Leviss last week over comments LaLa made about James Kennedy -- also in the mix, it was a recipe for disaster.
The party started off innocently enough, with Brittany showing up with a handle of vodka -- for wine night -- and Scheana bringing her own string cheese. But then LaLa decided this was also the perfect event at which to tell Raquel to stay in her lane.
"We're gonna have a real talk right now. Raquel, I want to make this very, very clear. When I pulled you aside at Sandoval's birthday, I was genuinely concerned," she said, regarding their heated conversation about James' alleged behavior. "I heard that James was at a party, I want to make sure he's okay. You turned it into such an ugly thing."
When Raquel tried to say LaLa made it ugly by resurfacing old rumors James and his male friend Logan had hooked up, Kent shut her down. "I'm speaking, let me finish," she shouted, "I think you've forgotten your place, but I'm gonna remind you."
As the two continued to bicker about Logan, LaLa said, "I want to bash my head into [this] f--king table." Added Raquel, "Please do!" Leviss then questioned how genuine LaLa's concern for James really was, which again set off Kent.
"Don't f--king talk to me about if I care, Raquel!" shouted LaLa, who then compared Raquel to a chihuahua on her "most vicious" day. "I'm a pit bull bitch," she continued, "I'm a Michael Vick fighting dog!"
"I think Lala sees me as more vulnerable and she prays on that," Raquel said in a confessional. "It's a very bully thing to do. If we don't all agree she's a bully, we can all agree she's a bitch."
That was the end of their fight, but not the only drama of the episode after what started as a prank war between Jax Taylor and the boys escalated into an awkward lovers' spat between Katie and Tom Schwartz.
Tom Sandoval and Max Boyens decided to toilet paper Jax's home for his birthday, something Taylor wasn't too thrilled about. As payback, LaLa's movie producer fiance Randall Emmett hired a couple actors to pretend to be cops and arrest Sandoval for vandalism at another party he and Ariana Madix were throwing.
Sandoval was legit sweating in the back of a faux cop car as everyone from the party started accusing Jax of calling the police on his friend. Eventually, Randall admitted it was all a ruse, but neither Ariana or Katie found it funny.
"I don't think it's funny to see friends handcuffed and put in the back of the car," Maloney said in a confessional. "Maybe I'm the only person who associated that with something terrible. Like, turn on the news."
While Sandoval loved it, his other half did not, calling it "tone deaf." In a confessional she added, "The mental relationship that some people have is very different from other people's mental relationship with police. So to joke around about them is in poor taste, in my opinion."
As Katie continued to voice her disapproval of the prank, Schwartz unloaded on her in front of everyone. "You're ruining a great moment, we're laughing," he said to her. "Nobody gives a shit about your opinion. I've never been more turned off in my life."
"That's why I don't have sex with her," he continued, railing against Katie. "She's a moron. That's another 2 months we're not having sex. Deeply turned off."
The outburst reminded Katie of their fight in Mexico, only this time they had an audience of friends. Sandoval tried to shut Schwartz up, before Beau even confronted him about his nasty comments. The episode ended with Katie walking out and telling Schwartz not to come with her.