"America has been breathlessly following the story ever since we learned the first details," says Stephen Colbert as he and Jimmy Kimmel weigh in on the arrest of Luigi Mangione, charged with the shooting death of United HealthCare CEO Brian Thompson.
The shooting that shocked the nation last week started eliciting a whole different response once pictures of the suspect, since identified as Luigi Mangione, began circulating. Once his name was revealed and his social media uncovered, the thirst became nigh unbearable.
The shooting was already ripe with controversial reactions because the victim, Brian Thompson, was CEO of UnitedHealthCare and many Americans have strong negative feelings about healthcare in the United States -- as apparently does the suspected shooter, based on a three-page "manifesto" police found on his person.
But things got even more controversial when everyone got a good look at the suspect.
Social Media Reactions to Luigi Mangione Arrest, Person of Interest In UnitedHealthcare CEO's Murder
View StoryLuigi Mangione was first seen in suspect photos circulated by the New York Police Department before he was spotted and positively identified at a McDonald's in Altoona, Pennsylvania. Those pictures started the thirst and it only escalated from there.
"America has been breathlessly following the story ever since we learned the first details," said Stephen Colbert, and as the story has progressed, they're finding it harder and harder to breathe.
Late Show with Stephen Colbert
As Colbert broke it down during his Late Show monologue, "This story started tragic, but then it very quickly added weird because when authorities initially released security photos of the suspect, the internet reaction was swift and horny."
He singled out one of the pictures from Mangione's Instagram page that featured the 26-year-old Ivy League graduate and high school valedictorian shirtless and looking particularly fit. "Holy happy trail, Batman!" Colbert marveled. "You know that guy's Italian 'cause you could grate parmesan on those abs."
He then poked a little fun of the name of the town where Mangione was spotted and identified by an employee as hew as eating at McDonald's. "Classic bad guy mistakes, fleeing to one of America's funny-name towns," he said of Altoona.
Colbert also noted reports that Mangione had traveled by Greyhound bus from Atlanta to New York City, marveling, "That's 18 hours on a Greyhound. Prison holds no fear for this man. You know Greyhound's slogan: What if a Port-a-Potty was stuck in traffic?"
Even as he talked about the suspect, though, Colbert refused to say his name. He explained, "If he didn't do it, I don't wanna say it. And if he did do it, I don't wanna say it." Instead, he used variations of the name, like "Guido Casseroli" and "Vinnie Rigatoni."
Everything We Know About Luigi Mangione, Charged with Murder of HealthCare CEO
View StoryJimmy Kimmel Live
Jimmy Kimmel, on the other hand, was all about the name. "His name is Luigi Mangione, and no matter how you feel about this, and people do have different feelings about this," he said, "I think we can all agree that no one could have imagined this suspect would have a name as funny as Luigi Mangione."
"With a lot of murderers, or alleged murderers, when you arrest them, you have to use the middle name," he continued. "Like, we don't need Luigi Wayne Mangione, it's not necessary."
He then went on to talk about Mangione getting arrested for "looking suspicious" while eating at a McDonald's. "Doesn't everyone look suspicious in McDonald's?" he asked. "Just sitting down and eating there is suspicious at McDonald's."
The late-night host took note of the detail that police suspect it's possible the shooter used a gun printed on a 3-D printer, which had Kimmel lamenting, "Had I known this was a real thing, I never would have spent so much time making fun of guys with 3-D printers."
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View StoryAs for the internet response to Mangione's arrest, Kimmel focused on the suspect's apparent GoodReads account, where he shared books he was reading, interested in, and even reviewed a few interesting selection.
"One of the books he reviewed is the Unabomber's manifesto. He gave it four stars out of five," Kimmel shared. "He reviewed the Unabomber and he reviewed Steve-O's autobiography. He gave that one three stars."
"Maybe if Steve-O had written a better book, he'd have just hit the guy in the nuts with a teeball bat instead," the comedian mused.
As some late-night shows tape before others, there wasn't a lot of commentary from Jimmy Fallon, Jon Stewart, or Seth Meyers on Mangione, but as Kimmel reminded us, "We're gonna be hearing a lot about this guy in the coming months," adding, "Diddy is like, thank god, someone else, please."