Carrie Underwood is comfortable in the spotlight now -- but it wasn't always so easy.

In the June issue of Marie Claire, the "American Idol" alum opens up about her history with panic attacks, which got really bad after winning the reality show.

"At the beginning of my career, I used to have panic attacks," she says. "People were touching me, screaming – it made me really nervous. In public, I just get nervous. It’s a physical reaction, feeling like the walls are closing in. The fans are great. It’s not their fault. I don’t ever want to come across as ungrateful. But on my end, it is hard for me to process. Because I am still just me."

Despite her initial discomfort with fame, she was destined for the limelight.

"You were supposed to say what you would be doing in 10 years [in her high school yearbook], and I said, ‘I will be rich, famous, and married to a hot guy,’" she says. "I guess I should have added a few more things!"

And while the 30-year-old country singer is happily married to Mike Fisher, the two probably aren't expanding their family anytime soon. 
"I don’t feel old enough to have kids," she tells the mag. "I know I am mature. But being responsible for another human?"

See more from Carrie when the June issue of Marie Claire hits newsstands May 21.


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