"Oh my God. This is Terrible. This is the end of my presidency. I'm f--cked."
The Mueller Report was finally released on Thursday — most of it anyway — and Twitter raced to dig the best lines out of the 448-page "lightly redacted" tome.
While it did not conclude President Donald Trump colluded with Russian interference in US elections, it also did not exonerate him of obstruction of justice, highlighting at least 11 occasions in which the investigation was hampered.
One of the most quoted lines in the report was one uttered by Trump himself, upon first finding out a special counsel had been appointed to investigate the matter: "Oh my God. This is Terrible. This is the end of my presidency. I'm f--cked."
It is my opinion that an innocent man wouldn't say the below words out loud. But that's just me. 🤷🏻♀️ pic.twitter.com/IL2mGZEtZv
@Alyssa_Milano
The #MuellerReport perfectly crystallises our age. Those who dislike Trump are leafing through looking for only that which incriminates, those who like him search only for what exculpates and exonerates. Each frantically ignoring what they don't want to see. I'm guilty too
@stephenfry
Imagine how many historical texts looked similar to this after awful men came together to edit the reputation of other awful men. #MuellerReport pic.twitter.com/ZJETfiW6Nl
@EugeneLeeYang
Alyssa Milano was one of the many quoting him, adding: "It is my opinion that an innocent man wouldn't say the below words out loud. But that's just me."
Westworld star Jeffrey Wright quoted the report, highlighting the part that clearly said the President could not be exonerated of obstruction of justice: "if we had confidence after a thorough investigation of the facts that the President clearly did not commit obstruction of justice, we would so state."
Tom Arnold, who hosts a semi-farcical documentary about searching for Trumps 'pee pee tapes', reminded followers that the President's former lawyer has offered to fill in the blanks of the redacted report.
"Michael Cohen has 14,000,000 new documents. Ask him about anyone in the Trump orbit. Michael has stories, dates & receipts. Ask about Trump. Michael's documented facts trump this White House of lies. When his country needed him most Michael Cohen stepped up. Bill Barr step down!"
YouTuber Eugene Lee Yang wrote: "Imagine how many historical texts looked similar to this after awful men came together to edit the reputation of other awful men. #MuellerReport"
Russia attacked us. The Trump campaign let it happen & encouraged it so he could cheat. That's clear in the #MuellerReport. Trump let a foreign govt. manipulate our election so he could win. Then, his team materially impaired the investigation. #Impeachhttps://t.co/jtJxKBx8F4
@mishacollins
Michael Cohen has 14,000,000 new documents. Ask him about anyone in the Trump orbit. Michael has stories, dates & receipts. Ask about Trump. Michael's documented facts trump this White House of lies. When his country needed him most Michael Cohen stepped up. Bill Barr step down! https://t.co/eCxVsXoHkk
@TomArnold
Supernatural star Misha Collins added: "Russia attacked us. The Trump campaign let it happen & encouraged it so he could cheat. That's clear in the #MuellerReport. Trump let a foreign govt. manipulate our election so he could win. Then, his team materially impaired the investigation. #Impeach"
Stephen Fry was among the few to admit the dissection of the report was largely partisan: "The #MuellerReport perfectly crystallises our age. Those who dislike Trump are leafing through looking for only that which incriminates, those who like him search only for what exculpates and exonerates. Each frantically ignoring what they don't want to see. I'm guilty too."
And of course there were jokes too, from the likes of Conan O'Brien: "I worry that the release of The Mueller Report is going to overshadow the fact that it's Melissa Joan Hart's birthday. #HappyBirthdayMelissaJoanHart"
The purpose of the Mueller probe was to investigate Russian interference into US elections, and whether or not the Trump campaign colluded with them.
On Thursday, a redacted copy of the report was released to the public, with four different types of color-coded redaction: grand jury information, sensitive intelligence about sources and methods, material about ongoing information (such as Republican activist Roger Stone, who has pleaded not guilty to lying to Congress) and material affecting peripheral third parties.
#MuellerReport: "...if we had confidence after a thorough investigation of the facts that the President clearly did not commit obstruction of justice, we would so state. Based on the facts and the applicable legal standards, we are unable to reach that judgment."
@jfreewright
Also, Mueller: pic.twitter.com/FYzyXraoKE
I wish a reporter would have asked Barr if Mueller finished with his investigation unimpeded or if he was asked by anyone to conclude it or if funding was stopped in any way.
@PattyArquette
I worry that the release of The Mueller Report is going to overshadow the fact that it's Melissa Joan Hart's birthday. #HappyBirthdayMelissaJoanHart
@ConanOBrien