Chris Appleton Details Coming Out to Partner and Kids, Suicide Attempt & Lukas Gage Relationship

Celebrity hairstylist Chris Appleton is opening up about his personal life, after spending years spotted alongside A-list stars including Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Lopez and Ariana Grande.

Ahead of the release of his new book, Your Roots Don't Define You, the 44-year-old appeared on the August 6 episode of Jay Shetty's On Purpose podcast. During the interview, he shared his coming out experience, revealing what it was like for him to tell his former partner Kate Katon that he was gay at the age of 26, after the two welcomed two kids together, Billy and Kitty-blu.

"I was like, 'I'm going to hurt all these people I've created this life with,'" he said, before referring to Kate. "We were together for nine years, had two kids and it was a magical nine years. I honestly thought I had it all figured out."

Then, everything "came crashing down" when he realized his sexuality -- telling Shetty that he "loved" Katon and "didn't want to be gay ... didn't want to be different."

"My job as a dad was to protect my kids. I just didn't want them to ever had that shame put onto them. In a way it felt like a disease, it felt like cancer and I wanted to cut it out. Like, 'if I could just get rid of that then I could be a good dad,'" he recalled thinking, before sharing that it was Katon's mother who told the news to the pair's children, who were just 6 and 8. Billy is now 22, while Kitty-blu is 20, with the two often appearing on Appleton's Instagram feed.

"They were upset because they knew I was upset. They were confused and all of a sudden I just felt like I just messed their life up," said Appleton. "I felt like I'd failed as a dad because my job was to protect them. And if anyone ever hurt them, I would protect them. But I was the one hurting them."

He then began to experience suicidal ideation, going on a drive for "a couple of hours" before attempting to take his life.

"I felt like it would be better for them to have a dad that was dead than a dad that was gay. It's not something I've ever spoken about," he told Shetty. "And so I brought some painkillers, I brought a bottle of alcohol and I checked myself into a hotel. I took the tablets and drank the alcohol. I rang Kate and I apologized for the pain that I'd caused."

"I closed my eyes and I just thought, this is it. This is it. I won't hurt anyone anymore ... and maybe I'll stop hurting too," he shared, adding that he doesn't remember anything until waking up at the hospital later. "And in that moment, something changed ... I decided to live," he explained, saying that he's now in a "good place."

Elsewhere in the interview, Appleton also reflected on his marriage to The White Lotus actor Lukas Gage, with the two tying the knot just two months after going public with their relationship. The marriage was short-lived, with the two filing for divorce six months later.

"This is the first time I've ever spoke about this. I think people have this perception, from social media probably, that I have it together. I work with these amazing people, life looks glamorous. So, from the outside it probably looks like I got it all together," he told Shetty.

"But the truth is, especially during that time, I was going through a lot of private pain, and then you go with all the online speculation part, people say things about you, there's things in the tabloid and people have an opinion on your life," he continued. "That can be incredibly intense, especially when you're just trying to deal with things."

He added that it's possible to "love someone and there not to be a forever happy ending," explaining that you can still "learn so much from it." Appleton went on to say that he's "learned so much" from any relationship he's been in, including "what's important to me in terms of boundaries, in terms of how I want to be loved, how I want to love" -- adding, "And that's a beautiful thing because it means you're always growing and evolving."

Appleton also told Shetty that "moving fast doesn't always mean you're reckless," saying that, in his mind, it also "means you're hopeful."

"And I think any relationship I've ever been into, I’ve gone into with an open heart. And I have no regrets about that," he added. "I would rather love and fall than to never feel anything at all. And I think I'd rather experience something and feel alive than to never put my foot out in the water."

As for breakups, he said they don't mean the relationship itself "didn't mean anything," telling Shetty, "People love to say like, 'Oh I knew you know that would happen and that wouldn’t last,' but I don’t know, it's just who I am. I go in wholeheartedly into every friendship, every relationship ... and I've learned to protect myself and also honor myself."

Appleton's book, Your Roots Don't Define You, is due out January 20, 2026 -- and is available for pre-order now.

If you or someone you know is struggling with depression or has had thoughts of harming themselves or taking their own life, get help. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255) provides 24/7, free, confidential support for people in distress.