Mike Myers' iconic "Austin Powers" character lays out his "Five Points of Evil" plan and reveals both his home state and his evi plans for the national anthem.
That's right, his evil lair inside a volcano is actually in Rhode Island, so hopefully the nation's smallest state was paying very close attention to his message.
When Jimmy Fallon asked why he was making a run for Congress, Dr. Evil shot back, "It's 2018. Evil's in right now. It's hip. It's like playing 'Fortnite' while slamming a Tide pod and doing the Shiggy challenge."
He then joked that he'd originally considered going for the position of Supreme Court Justice over Brett Kavanaugh, "but Trump said I was too even-tempered for that."
Calling himself an "Eviltarian," Dr. Evil revealed that he has his own variation of the red MAGA hat emblazoned with the slogan "Make America Evil Again."
He even laid out his dynamic new plan for the nation which he called his "5-point evil plan," which apparently included keeping on one of President Trump's key advisors. His plan was to implement Don Jr. as Secretary of Treasurey because he's made out of dough ... literally.
"He looks like he's actually made out of dough," Dr. Evil explained. "He's like the Pillsbury Doughboy. I just want to poke his belly."
But he saved his most diabolical plan for the national anthem. It's just too horrific for us to go into here, and we warn you that if you watch the video you will never be able to escape it.
Myers absolutely kills it in one of his most iconic roles, with Dr. Evil despertely trying to sound hip and cool and being so over-the-top corny with his "evil" that we were left wishing we could get another Austin Powers movie. This character is too good to only dust off from time to time for random late-night political jokes.
If we can't get a full Austin Powers, we'd take a Dr. Evil movie. Maybe he becomes the hero of the story after Austin Powers goes missing and he realizes he's nothing without his archenemy. Myers is too strong in this character to let it languish. Call it "Dr. Evil Saves America (by Saving Austin Powers)."
In this era of reboots and sequels decades later, Meyers has proven he has a fresh but iconic take on the character still, and really gets how he could work in Trump's America. What a great time for his triumphant return. We'll just go ahead and line up for tickets now, because we're sure Myers is totally getting on this for us.
Got a story or a tip for us? Email TooFab editors at email@example.com.