"It was one of the worst days of my life actually," he said of the day he auditioned for the Bond movie.
Alan Cumming is opening up about his battle with mental health.
While speaking with CBS Morning's Anthony Mason on Tuesday about his upcoming memoir, "Baggage: Tales from a Fully Packed Life," the 56-year-old actor shared one of his "darkest moments" as a struggling actor in Hollywood.
Cumming said that while auditioning for his breakout role in the 1995 James Bond film, "GoldenEye," he was at an all time low.
Actor @AlanCumming shares some of his personal and career highs and lows in his new memoir, “Baggage: Tales From a Fully Packed Life” — and how his mantra, “Cancel, continue,” has helped him work through trauma. pic.twitter.com/W4k03dlgmc
— CBS Mornings (@CBSMornings) October 26, 2021 @CBSMornings
Cumming recalled feeling like "a hot mess" at the time, as repressed memories of abuse started to come back to the surface. "When I was 28, I suddenly remembered all this stuff from my childhood," he said. "It's still with me, I still get triggered by things. And we all have baggage, we all have trauma."
Speaking of the day he auditioned for Bond, he called it "one of the worst days of my life, actually."
"I felt really, really, really low," he recalled. "I just now think, 'Oh, you poor little thing, you could've said I am feeling suicidal today.'"
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View StoryWhen Cummings landed the role as villainous Boris Grishenko in "GoldenEye," it changed everything for him -- something he only truly understood when he sat down to write his memoir.
"That's something I realized when I was writing, like, oh my God, Hollywood saved me," he revealed. "I have this sort of mantra, which is 'Cancel, continue.' When something bad happens I think, okay that happened, we can't change that, let's move on."
"Baggage: Tales from a Fully Packed Life" is a follow-up to his 2014 book, "Not My Father's Son." The memoir is available now.