"There is a club that I just wasn't a part of."
Jennifer Lopez may be one of the most famous celebrities in the entire world -- but finding success has not only caused some issues with her family, but has also left her feeling like an outsider among her own peers in Hollywood.
Speaking with Rolling Stone for a new cover story, Lopez opened up about how her rise to the top coincided with some difficult moments with her parents, who have clearly had some trouble adjusting to and understanding her new lifestyle.
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View Story"How could they? I think they are confused by my life," J.Lo told the publication. "When one person becomes famous in a family it causes a lot of discord. It can be complicated for both sides. It got complicated for me, like, 'Is this still, you know, my family who loves me and accepts me and understands me and feels like I'm the same person, or do they see me as different as well?'"
"For them, it was like, 'OK, well, now she's this, and what does that mean? How much do I expect? How much do I ask for and how much do I not?' There's confusion," said Lopez. "There's resentment and very mixed, complicated, adult feelings. You know, 'What is all this?'"
Lopez has felt similar feelings herself when it comes to her peers in Hollywood, many of whom apparently haven't been so welcoming or respectful to her. It's a feeling that has left J.Lo -- arguably one of the most successful women in the industry -- still feeling like "an underdog," even now.
"I always feel like I was scrapping from the bottom. Always. I always felt like I wasn't the one that was supposed to be in the room. That's part of being Puerto Rican and from the Bronx and a woman. You know what I mean?" she said. "All of that stuff. Not being born into a family with money. Not knowing anybody in the business. I just went out there and said, 'F--- it. I'm going to just try. I'm going to try to get in here.'"
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Despite past success in dramatic roles for projects including "Selena," "Out of Sight" and "Hustlers," Lopez said she still isn't considered for Oscar-bait material -- telling Rolling Stone, "I don't even know half the movies when they come out at the end of the year." She added, "I have the top agents in the world, but [those projects] don't come to me," leading her to "take my career in my own hands" with her own production company.
That feeling of being left out has translated over to the music world as well, where Lopez feels being a pop star had excluded her from being taken more seriously.
"It's just 20, 25 years of people going, 'Well, she's not that great. She's pretty and she makes cute music, but it's not really this and that.' You know, I think I've done some nice work over the years, some really nice work. But there is a club that I just wasn't a part of,'" she explained. "And I always acted like, 'Yeah, I'm good. I'm fine. I'm OK.' But it hurts to not be included."
"I don't know if I will ever be. There is an inner circle, like, 'We are the great artists.' And then there’s the pop artists,'" she added.
All that being said, Lopez told the magazine she still tries to always "live from a place of gratitude" and show how grateful she is for all she has. "Today, especially, if you ask me what my first thought was, it was, 'Thank you. Thank you, God, for this day. Thank you for my life, what it is.'"