Does "Bro Code" still work when the person you're refusing to tell is your own sister?
A dude has taken to the internet for advice after his sister branded him an a--hole.
The story, posted to an anonymous forum, saw the 28-year-old detail a night out on the town for his future brother-in-law's bachelor party that ended up causing some drama the following morning.
OP (a.k.a. the "original poster") admitted he's quite close with the guy marrying his older sister -- but his reasons for staying silent were never made entirely explicit in the post.
Read on to see the full story and how Redditors reacted.
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View StoryThe Original AITA Post on Reddit
"My (28M) sister (30F) is getting married in about a month, and her fiancé (31M), with whom I have a very good relationship, had his bachelor party over this weekend," OP wrote, getting right to it in his post. "I was invited, and I hadn’t been to many of those, but it seemed like standard bachelor party stuff to me. We just went pub crawling and ended up in a strip club."
He then offered one caveat, declaring his ignorance about one important detail.
"I don’t know what sort of 'agreement' future BIL [brother-in-law] had with my sister about this party, and I didn’t ask. And I certainly wasn’t prepared when my sister texted me today asking me about the party."
When she kept insisting, I just told her to stop being insecure about it.
"It started with a simple 'how was it?' and eventually it moved to 'did he do anything?'," he continued. "Of course, as her brother, I was the only person she could 'ask' (the other guests were his personal friends). But I told her she should stop inquiring me and ask her fiancé if she wants to know anything."
"The truth is I didn’t even see him do anything remotely inappropriate (for this context anyway), but just the fact that I didn't want to get involved and refused to say anything made her feel like I was indeed covering for him or something. So when she kept insisting, I just told her to stop being insecure about it."
"Apparently that was me crossing the line because she called me up just to say I had no right to judge her like that. I told her that was how she was coming across to me. AITA here?"
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View Story"Are You Deliberately Trying to Make Your BFF Brother in Law Look Guilty" And Other Reddit Reactions
Despite the occasional "your sister is insecure brah" responses, Redditors overwhelmingly sided with the dude's sibling.
For the most part, people on the subreddit were confused by his reticence to simply respond with the info he gave in his post -- i.e. nothing even "remotely inappropriate" happened.
The highest rated comment pretty much summed it up: "YTA [you're the a--hole]. It would not have cost you anything to say 'nothing happened.' I've been to bachelor parties and 'nothing happened' is NOT the default answer. Worry and suspicion are perfectly valid feelings for her to have in that situation."
"All you did was heighten her suspicions about what her fiance did or didn't do. Your non-answer was an answer, and not a good one," they continued. "You left your sister worried and your friend in a world of shit. TWO WORDS could have made everything better, but for some reason, you refused to say them. A--hole move for sure."
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View StoryIn that same thread, another Redditor disagreed: "Call me old-fashioned, but I think it’s a bit weird to marry someone you think is cheating on you during his literal bachelor party for the wedding, and if my sibling asked such an uncomfortable question, I’d be a bit peeved. Sounds like run-of-the-mill trust issues and that will only get worse if she feeds into it and acts as his babysitter."
While another had a more humorous reaction.
"Are you deliberately trying to make your BFF brother in law look guilty," they wrote. "Show some maturity and tell the truth rather than stirring up drama. YTA."
Of course, there were those who kept insisting the future bride was monstrously insecure. One commenter shared what seemed to be a rather likely scenario in response: "Sister could’ve easily been joking initially, I can’t imagine not asking my brother, 'did he get into anything bad?' AS A JOKE, like my brother was there, surely my fiancé isn’t an idiot but it’s just a ‘haha’ rhetorical question that blows my life apart when my brother responds, 'don’t ask me, you need to ask him.'"
What do you think?