Jana Kramer Weighs In on 'It Ends With Us,' Says Domestic Violence Does 'Define You'

Jana Kramer, actress, country music singer and survivor of domestic violence, has some thoughts on the way It Ends With Us star Blake Lively is handling promotion of the film.

"I would love the messaging to go to DV with media, instead of talking about riffs and everything else. The movie is about domestic violence," the 40-year-old said during an episode of her podcast Whine Down.

"I haven't seen the movie. I have a tough time watching movies that deal with domestic violence given my history with it," she shared.

Lively, 37, has been battling an immense amount of negativity regarding the way she has been promoting the film as a "rom-com" rather than a film that details a woman grappling with domestic abuse.

Kramer said she too was under the impression It Ends With Us was a "rom-com, bring your girls to the movie[s]" type of film.

"Then I started hearing stuff about the interviews, and for me, I was just, like, it made me sad because I just want the messaging to be about domestic violence and how to help people and how to get help," she said, seemingly touching on both how it's being promoted, as well as how the movie and the alleged feud between Lively and director/costar Justin Baldoni has been covered by the media.

She then emphasized that it is difficult for those who have not gone through it to discuss DV.

"It's hard for people to talk about domestic violence when they haven't, themselves, been, in real life, had the hands of domestic violence on them." She added: "So, for people to say it doesn't define you, it does define you. It has made me who I am. And though people can say, 'It doesn’t define you,' it is one of the biggest pieces of me, is domestic violence, and has been the biggest thread in my life."

Kramer's comments come after Lively's interview with BBC News during the press line at the London premiere of the film in early August.

Lively discussed her character Lily Bloom's view on domestic violence and expressed that Lily is "not defined" by it.

"She defines herself, and I think that that’s deeply empowering to remind people that no-one else can define you. No experience can define you. You define you," Lively explained.

Kramer first revealed she had been "mentally, physically and emotionally abused" in past relationships in 2021 in an emotional Instagram post.

"I've been mentally physically and emotionally abused in past relationships," she said at the time. "I allowed certain behaviors to continue on because I actually believed the negative voices in my head that were spoken to me. 'No one will want you'….'you're the problem'….'I'm going to kill you'…..”I barely pushed you, don’t be so dramatic”…'you bruise easily, I hardly touched you, you're crazy'…if you wore something sexier I would sleep with you'…. 'You are the common denominator.'"

She went on to say she believed she wasn't "enough" for years and continued to repeat the pattern of hurting herself and others. "And I've fallen for the same abuse in a relationship because it's what I thought I deserved," she added in the post.

Kramer's been open about the abuse she experienced in her first marriage, detailing some of the more traumatizing moments she experienced at the hands of ex-husband, Michael Gambino, in her book The Next Chapter: Making Peace with Hard Memories, Finding Hope All Around Me, and Clearing Space for Good Things to Come.

"I had my head bashed into bathroom mirrors countless times and was choked and shoved on a weekly basis. Almost every morning around three o'clock, he would throw me out of bed after coming home from a rager at a club," Kramer shared of Gambino, to whom she was wed for less than a year after tying the knot in 2004. "Toward the end of our, let's just call it, courtship, I was his rag doll. I was so depressed and scared, and all I wanted was an out, but I was trapped."

Things continued to escalate during their short-lived marriage with Gambino choking Kramer so severely one night, that he thought he killed her. He was later arrested and sentenced to six years in prison for attempted murder. He died by suicide in 2012.

If you are experiencing domestic violence, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, or go to thehotline.org. The hotline is available 24/7 in more than 170 languages; Calls are confidential and toll-free.