Chris Rock kicked off the Academy Awards exactly how everyone expected him to -- by tackling the diversity issues plaguing this year's show.
"I counted at least 15 black people in that montage," he said as he walked on stage, after a montage of this year's film highlights played for the audience in the crowd and at home. "I'm here at the Academy Awards, otherwise known as the White People's Choice Awards!"
"If they nominated hosts, I wouldn't even get this job," he continued. "You'd be watching Neil Patrick Harris right now. This is the wildest craziest Oscars to ever host, because of the controversy. No black nominees. People are like, 'Chris, you should boycott.' How come it's only unemployed people who tell you to quit something! I thought about quitting, but I realized they're gonna have the Oscars anyway ... and the last thing I need is to lose another job to Kevin Hart!"
Rock then questioned why this year was the year everyone decided to speak out.
"It's the 88th Academy Awards, which means this whole no black nominees thing has happened at least 71 other times," he continued. "You gotta figure it happened in the 50, 60s. [But] Black people didn't protest. Why? Because we had real things to protest at the time. Too busy being raped and lynched to care about who won Best Cinematographer. When your grandmother's swinging from a tree, it's very hard to are about Best Documentary Foreign Short."
Then he went in on Jada Pinkett Smith.
"People went mad. Spike got mad. Sharpton got mad. Jada went mad. Will went mad," Rock continued. "Jada says she's not coming ... I'm like, isn't she on a TV show? Jada boycotting the Oscars is like me boycotting Rihanna's panties. I wasn't invited!"
"Jada's mad her man will wasn't nominated," he went on. "It's not fair that Will was this good and didn't get nominated. It's also not fair that Will was paid $20 million for 'Wild Wild West.'"
"In the In Memoriam package, it's just gonna be black people that were shot by the cops on the way to the movies," he added, as everyone cracked up and applauded in the audience.
He ended his monologue by introducing the first presenters of the night ... and couldn't resist taking one final shot.
"Welcome Emily Blunt and somebody whiter, Charlize Theron."
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