DJ Pauly D Reveals Which 'Housewives' He Would Smush, 'Jersey Shore' Threesome Partners and Much More

Pauly D was an open book during a Thursday night appearance on "Watch What Happens Live," talking about everything from which reality stars he would "smush" and the state of his famous Prince Albert penis piercing.

Andy Cohen kicked things off by asking him a series of questions about his "Jersey Shore" cast-mates and which of them he would want to be there for him in varying situations like bailing him out of jail (Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi), joining him in a threesome (Ronnie Ortiz-Magro "because I think he's single") and even hooking up with directly.

Andy pinned that choice down to Deena Cortese or Snooki, which made Pauly immediately uncomfortable. "Those are my sisters, oh man," he said. But after a few moments to think about it, he settled on the perfect solution: "Threesome!"

Pauly was even asked which of the OG guys hooked up with the most chicks during their MTV heyday, him or Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino. At first, Pauly totally pleaded the fifth, but that only lasted a second ... and this isn't that game anyway, Pauly!

"Yo, Mike was a savage back in the day," Pauly admitted. "So maybe him."

Now, of course, Mike is behind bars, so a caller asked how he was doing and Pauly said he was actually really surprised by the reality of this prison compared to his preconceptions.

"I went there to visit him and I thought they were going to like basically strip search me and stuff like that," he said. "It wasn't the case. It was very laid back." He said he was even allowed to keep his phone with him during the visit.

As for Mike, Pauly said "he's happy, positive. He's just so happy to get it over with and he just wants to come out ... He's almost done." Mike is scheduled to be released on September 12.

During the show, Andy set up what he thought might be a fun game by showing Pauly a series of photos of various "Housewives" from across the franchises to see which ones he might want to invite back to the smush room.

But this is Pauly D at 38 years old, not the 20-something hard-partying bad boy who rocked the "Jersey Shore" from 2009 to 2012.

Either way, we cycled through pictures of Sonja Morgan, Cynthia Bailey, Ramona Singer, Vicki Gunvalson, Porsha Williams, Bethenny Frankel, Barbara Kavovit, Kelly Dodd and Tinsley Mortimer. Pauly's answer for every single one of them was delivered with increasing gales of laughter: "Smushy!"

Honestly, how do you expect the guy to diss one of these women like that on national television? Of course he was going to say they were all smush-able, unless he wanted to create a "Housewives" feud with the "Shore." Actually, we'd be down for a "RHONJ" crossover with the "Shore" gang. Maybe Pauly could drop by and offer to smush them all.

Girlfriends and hookups have been talking about it for years, but Andy Cohen wanted to hear it from the DJ's mouth, so he asked Pauly, "Is it true that you pierced your penis"

As there's no point in lying about it now, Pauly easily admitted to it. But when Andy marveled that he has a Prince Albert (we'll not explain that here, good people!), Pauly clarified the tense.

"Not anymore," he said. It turns out this was one of those kinds of decisions you make as a young "rock star" wanting to live a rock star lifestyle and as Pauly put it, "have a rock star penis."

So why did he remove it? "I got sick of it and took it out," he said.

A caller asked Pauly D about his recent stint on the MTV dating show "Double Shot at Love," which just wrapped at the end of June. In the show, Pauly and fellow "Jersey Shore" cast-mate Vinny Guadagnino pared down a group of contestants in an attempt to find love. Vinny was able to choose someone, though they've since broken up, but Pauly ended the show by eliminating both of his finalists, including Nikki Hall.

Nikki gained some notoriety among "Jersey" fans when she shared a bunch of text messages she purported were between her and Pauly, refuting his stance that there just wasn't a connection between them. She claims the messages prove he was as into her as she was into him. If they are from him, she has a solid argument.

So it was actually a great question to get his take on her leaking those messages and find out where Pauly stands with Nikki today. "We left sort of on bad terms," Pauly said. "We talked a little bit after the show but it never really amounted to anything and I think that really got her mad."

The closest he came to addressing any of the specifics was when he said, "I saw a lot of red flags there, so I distanced myself and I'm kind of sticking with that, distancing myself from that whole thing." In other words, he's not going to spill that tea. You can almost feel Andy's sadness from here. He hates when tea stays firmly in teacups.

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