While one person asked "What stick up the rear end boomer is running that company?" pretty much everyone else agreed with the "I literally wear a buisness (sic) suit every single day" parent.
A parent who "works in stocks" has taken to the internet for advice after a conflict with their daughter.
While the story, shared to an anonymous forum, appeared at face value to present some level of prejudice, Redditors quickly came to the defense of OP (a.k.a. the "original poster") for a few specific reasons. Whether these armchair philosophers in the AITA (Am I The A--hole) forum were right or not is up for you to decide.
Read on to see the whole story.
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View StoryThe Original AITA Reddit Post
"My son went into business and I passed on his resume for him to get an internship," OP began. "He did extremely well and it was a good reference for him. I only did this because he was a good match for the company. Also all I did was pass on his resume and he did all the work with interviews and whatnot."
However, the same service was not given to their daughter.
"My daughter is also in business, she asked me to pass on her resume for the company," OP wrote. "I told her no for one main reason. She will not get passed (sic) the first interview process due to her tattoos."
"The company is very strict on tattoos and doesn't hire people with in visible area," They went on to explain. "They work with many high end clients so the employee have a strict dress-code. Her tattoos are very visible and aggressive art. I know the moment she shows up she will be out of the running. I also don’t want to put my name in that whole situation."
Of course this did not go down well.
"I explained my reasoning and she is calling me a jerk for not supporting her. I told her she can apply online if she really wants but I am not throwing my name in especially since I know she will be turned away."
"This was asked a few times, it's also in comment," OP went on to add in an edit. "She has neck and hand tattoos".
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While, as we noted above, the lion's share of reactions on the thread were supportive of OP that doesn't mean there weren't some naysayers -- and of course, these were the only people the conflicted parent responded to.
One sarcastically asked: "What stick up the rear end boomer is running that company where they have a zero tolerance tattoo policy in 2024? I work for a company that routinely meets with the top people in even Fortune 500s and those rooms are full of people with 'ink.'"
OP replied: "I work in stocks, my job has always had a strict dresscode. A lot of companies still have strict dresscodes, not ever company is like yours. I literally wear a buisness (sic) suit every single day."
A few Redditors then called out OP's spelling -- from how they spelled "business" to the incorrect use of "passed" in the original post. While another wrote: "I hope she can spell and construct a sentence better than OP. As a hiring manager, his post would automatically exclude him from my shortlist. Spelling and grammar still count."
I'm all for people making whatever choice about their body they want but if I'm interviewing someone for a job and they have a tattoo on their face or neck, I'm going to question their decision-making.
OP replied: "I am on my phone and typed fast. Also this is Reddit, I truly don't care about grammar on Reddit. This isn't a resume or cover letter, where grammar and sentence structure actually matter. It's reddit."
Elsewhere OP explained the tattoos were not easy to hide: "She can't wear a turtle neck every day. I know they are hard to hide since she tried to hide them for her sister wedding. It didn't work well. She literally has a snake crawling up her neck, it's difficult to hide."
One Redditor added in response: "So do I; but tattoos are incredibly common. You know what group of people often has tattoos (nearly always)? Military veterans. A common group in the business world. Most companies with a no tattoos policy are run by jerks with a chip on their shoulder about veterans in my experience. Also not to go for the low blow here but what's with the superiority attitude when you can't even spell the word 'business' correctly, repeatedly?"
OP replied: "Okay, still doesn’t change the company policy. They do not hire people with visible tattoos." He also, elsewhere, said his daughter is not a veteran.
But other than those criticisms, OP got a tremendous amount of support.
The following is a sampling of those Redditors who took OP's side.
- "While fewer and fewer companies are maintaining strict dress code, you have the right to protect the respect of your reference. It would look incredibly bad for you to highly recommend someone that you know does not meet the requirements for the job. Your daughter should also look for a company that is a better culture fit for her, not just the easiest to get into the door."
- "Facial and neck tattoos are going to make it difficult for you to get a job in a lot of fields. People can disagree but this is reality. I'm all for people making whatever choice about their body they want but if I'm interviewing someone for a job and they have a tattoo on their face or neck, I'm going to question their decision-making. And that's the issue. It's not- she has tattoos. It's she decided to get tattoos in locations that are problematic for many jobs."
- "NTA [Not The A--hole], it really sucks for her that your company is like that. But sadly that's the reality. You know your company and you know they will throw her out immediately. This will also reflect badly on you."
- "NTA and really the bulk of those calling you one are people that haven't the credibility to be a strong reference, themselves. so, totally worthless opinions. A person with standing and respect to make a recommendation does so because they themselves respect the value and can be trusted for their recommendation. Basically you're fast tracking an applicant with the statement that you know what that business needs and are saying this applicant is strong for the role. trust you. Ignoring an absolute and known flag damages your future credibility and will not change the fact that the applicant is an absolute poor fit for the role."
What do you think?