Christina Applegate Clarifies 'I Don't Enjoy Living' Comments, Frustration with Online Reaction

During an episode of her MeSsy podcast earlier this month, the 52-year-old actress opened up about the mental health challenges she's faced since being diagnosed with MS in 2021, sharing that she's in the depths of a "real depression" and felt "trapped in this darkness."

"This is being really honest...I don't enjoy living. I don't enjoy it. I don't enjoy things anymore," Applegate said.

After fans expressed concern over her comments, Applegate clarified her remarks on Tuesday's episode of her and Jamie-Lynn Sigler's MeSsy podcast.

"I'm going to address something that recently happened ... I was talking about some dark stuff that I was thinking and feeling ... I feel like when we hold things in we give them power," Applegate explained. "I also think that there's so much shame a lot of people feel when they're going through mental health issues ... and when people hold those in, because they're so afraid to say how they truly feel, we give it immense power."

"Not only holding things in gives it power but it also can cause disease in your body -- cancer, all sorts of things. Loneliness. All of that, by holding it in because society has told us we're supposed to be just f--king fine. And I am not into that," she continued. "I am not a proponent of that kind of thing. I think it is incredibly healing and important to be able to express the thoughts, whether that makes someone uncomfortable or not."

The Married with Children alum went on to express that she took issue with how many people -- not including their listeners -- reacted to her comments.

"By making such a big deal about it you're making other people think, 'Oh, s--t, I can't talk about this,'" she said. "And that is not OK with me. I think it's important to be able to say these things. And, no, I'm not sitting here on suicide watch, OK? I am not. Nor have I ever been."

"But f--k do dark thoughts come through my head sometimes when you're dealing with something that has taken a huge part of you away," she continued.

"I dare anyone to be diagnosed with MS or any kind of chronic illness that has taken who you were prior to that moment and go, 'This is great.' You know?" Applegate added. "No, you have moments of feeling, 'This is tiring and I don't want to do this.' But you do it, and by having friends like you and my beautiful friends that I have saying this s--t loud it releases the pressure in the balloon, man."

Sigler -- who too suffers from MS and has been battling the disease for more than 20 years -- explained that she's grateful they have their podcast to discuss these types of topics and have difficult conversations, noting that these are "conversations between friends, and this is how you talk to friends."

"I can promise you, Christina, I have had moments where I have prayed that I didn’t wake up," she admitted. "Where the days just felt so hard. It just felt so daunting. It felt so scary. It felt so overwhelming. And like you said, it was a moment. It was a moment and they're very real. And you have to -- like you said -- express them and get them out."

"What I hear from that is, 'I pray to not wake up like this,' you know?" Applegate replied to her pal. "Of course, you want to be there. You know, we have children. We have family. We have loved ones. It's OK for us to say, 'I don't want to wake up like this.' This does not serve me. And I want to wake up like how I used to."

Meanwhile, also during Tuesday's podcast episode, the Dead to Me actress got candid about her past experience with using cannabis, sharing why she no longer smokes weed after she once took a joint from her mother.

"Me on any kind of cannabis product is not a pretty sight," Applegate said. "Real paranoia, it'll destroy ya, like, real freaky."

"Before I knew it was MS and they thought it was peripheral neuropathy, and I was in a lot of pain and anxiety over it," she continued.

The Vacation star recalled how her mom purchased a joint for her, telling her it would "help" her pain and anxiety.

"I was flipping out, so I went outside, and I smoked half of it," she said. "I saw serpents on my feet. My tongue was moving all weird."

"I called [my mom], and I said, 'What the f--k? What is this?'" Applegate added. "She goes, 'Tini, it's medical grade. It's supposed to be one hit.'"

She said that she asked herself if she was "going to die" because of how much weed she consumed.

"I made myself stay up until it wore off. It was hours," Applegate said, before concluding, "So yeah, we don't [smoke]. ... Not this lady. Not gonna happen."

If you or someone you know is struggling with depression or has had thoughts of harming themselves or taking their own life, get help. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255) provides 24/7, free, confidential support for people in distress.