According to the Guardian, salacious details also include her summation of his penis size: "smaller than average," but "not freakishly small."
"It may have been the least impressive sex I'd ever had, but clearly, he didn't share that opinion," she wrote of her alleged tryst with Trump at a celebrity golf tournament in Lake Tahoe, California, in 2006.
Twitter is now collectively trying to cope with the trauma of having that visual of the First Penis stuck in their head. Enjoy everyone else's pain below as you try to numb yours.
Aye Aye! DO NOT click Mario Kart!!!!!! Just keep it movin