Future In-Laws 'Humiliated' When Groom Tells Adoption Story, Why He Has Two Dads

The young groom in question took to the internet for advice after a blowup with his future in-laws. But he ended up teaching all of us internet denizens about true love.

While the story was shared to an anonymous forum, making it impossible to verify, everyone in the Reddit community took this tale to heart.

Buckle up ... this one's a tearjerker.

He began by giving some backstory on the whole situation.

"So I (25M) am engaged to my fiancée Erin (also 25F). Since we started actively planning our wedding, Erin's family but mostly her parents, have developed an obsession with stating how tragic/sad/unfortunate, etc it is that I won't have my 'real family' there and that there'll be no blood relatives of mine present for the wedding or our life together."

The original poster (a.k.a. "OP") explained that his fiancee fully had his back in the conflict.

"Erin has told them my real family are my dads and my siblings but they wave that off like it's BS. Erin has told them the topic is to be closed and we have left on a couple of occasions because they brought it up since."

However, that of course did not stop the future in-laws from sharing their unwanted observations.

As OP stated, "This last time I decided to be open."

He first set the scene.

"It was a dinner where Erin's immediate family were present and some family friends. Erin's parents brought it up again [about] how tragic it is," he recounted, "and so I decided to divulge my feelings and my experience with adoption and my parents."

OP then provided a brief interlude, where he gave background information on himself: "I was removed from my biological parents at the age of 5 and placed in foster care. I had a very unstable 2 years before I met my dad and my pa. I was 7 when I moved in with them, 9 when I became eligible for adoption and that same year I welcomed the first of my two siblings. I was so lucky to find my parents and to end up with the family I have. I remember clearly some of the bad with my biological family and I don't miss that."

He then pivoted back to the dinner in question.

"So I told my future ILs that I didn't find it tragic at all," he recalled. "That people who can make a 5 year old feel so unloved that they never see a future where someone could care for them. That you can be surrounded by those who share your DNA and never experience kindness or love."

"I told them I could not imagine having any of those people in my life today and I could not imagine thinking DNA means more than love."

If those reading were not already tearing up, then came the moment that opened the floodgates: "I told them I was miserable being with those people and I wished every day for someone to love me and that I didn't know love until I was 7 and I met my parents, and more specifically my dad, who embodies love and is hands down the most loving, caring, compassionate and thoughtful person I have ever met. He is my shining example of someone who loves and has such a deep capacity to love."

"I told them my real parents are the dad and pa who took in a kid who was so depressed and scared and dragged down that he didn't eat like a normal person, was afraid to sleep and would often cry when sleep did overtake him," OP wrote. "I told them that my real parents are the people who walked me to school every morning, who sat and helped me catch up with school and homework because I was so far behind that I should have been back in kindergarten. I told them my real family are the parents and siblings who know I do not share their DNA but love me anyway and have been there for me through every single step of my life since I was 7 and who made me a forever part of their family through adoption."

Sadly, that story of true love did not move the parents of his fiancee.

"My future ILs were silent after that. But they told me I humiliated them and made them uncomfortable in their own home and I shouldn't have spoken like that."

His future wife, thankfully, defended him: "Erin told them they should learn when to quit and apologize to me."

He concluded by asking if he was the a--hole in this situation.

Of course, no one in their right mind would think OP was an a--hole.

That being said, there were some questions and the young man was more than happy to answer them.

"Definitely NTA and good for Erin for fully backing you up," wrote on Redditor, in the highest rated comment. "You say a dad and a pa - so I assume you have 2 dads. I’m wondering if this is more their issue than blood, TBH. Which is really sad. Regardless- you put them in their place. You did nothing wrong."

"Yes, two dads. And I think they see adoption that way in general and not just because I have two dads," OP responded. "But it would be sad if that makes it worse to them because I was raised in such a loving home."

Another Redditor observed: "No of course you're NTA. They got themselves humiliated by bringing it up when they knew they were supposed to drop it. Was there yelling or something? Because I thought you were going to say you went into graphic detail about the neglect/abuse you suffered at their hands so the real 'tragedy' was that your 'real parents' were so terrible."

"Did they think you were adopted at birth or something? Did they not know you were taken away from your birth parents because they created an environment that was a threat to your safety and well-being? They really thought you were just going to take it and let them go on and on, huh? Yeah, and if you guys are considering adopting kids just realize her parents aren't going to see the kids as their real grandkids. Clearly blood is what truly matters to them," the Redditor continued.

To which OP replied: "They were aware I was in foster care and removed from my birth parents but nothing specific. Even now they don't know all the details. But no, I was not yelling or even loud when I spoke to them."

When someone else noted it was tragic it took so many years for a family to adopt him, he wrote back: "I think so too. Now that I'm at the point of my life that I'm at today, it makes me so sad to think about the little boy who knew no love."

"My dad admitted he sobbed a lot when I first came into their lives because he couldn't understand anyone could make a child feel the way I did," he continued. "He had never met a foster kid who had no joy at all, not even a fleeting piece. But that was me and it took a while for that fleeting moment of joy to become a reality."