"Why don't you worry about your own goddamn marriage and stop worrying about my man," Lala tells Katie.
On Monday's episode, Scheana Marie told Lala that Katie Maloney made yet another comment about Lala's "married boyfriend" while the ladies were discussing an upcoming trip to Las Vegas. Scheana told Katie that she and Lala would be flying to Sin City via a private jet, courtesy of Lala's boyfriend.
"Get the f-ck up outta here, bitch," an angry Lala said. "You're gonna mention my man again? Are you trying to get popped, or are you trying to get along? Because we can go both ways. My blood is boiling."
"Let's talk about married people cheating," she continued loudly, clapping in between each syllable (because emphasis). "Your man made out with my friend. Why don't you worry about your own goddamn marriage and stop worrying about my man, who is very much not married, who has been my man for a year..."
Scheana and Ariana Madix, who was also present during this conversation, were dumbfounded: Wait... Hold on... Back it up... What?!
"Like before the got married?" Scheana asked.
"No, while they were married," Lala replied.
"Katie and Stassi and Kristen all went to New York," Lala explained. "I get a phone call from my friend Allie, and she's like, 'La, oh my God, Tom Schwartz is here. And she goes, 'Dude, he can't keep his hands off of me. They made out. He was like touchy-feely."
"I was down for her. I was never gonna say anything. She is not safe anymore," Lala continued. "You f-ck with my relationship, I am coming for you full force. Dude, what a dumb ass bitch. Well, her marriage is gonna end, so that's her karma."
Flashback to Allie telling Lala the details: "Tom was pretty drunk. Hammered. He's calling me Bubba all night. We started talking, and he just kissed me."
The next day, Ariana confronted Tom about the allegations, saying the makeout sesh supposedly happened "in like January or February at the Bungalow."
"There's no way," he said. "No, it couldn't have been. I remember going to Bungalow, but I definitely don't remember making out with anybody. I got sh-tfaced that night."
"I believe that you don't remember," Ariana fired back. "If that happened, you gotta deal with it."
Tom ended up telling Katie about it -- at the party they were all at -- and she lost it: "Are you f-cking kidding me?! Tom, you're untethered. I let you go and have drinks with your boys. You can't stop making out with people that aren't your f-cking wife. What the f-ck is wrong with you? You need help. Get it the f-ck together. Get it together!"
"Vanderpump Rules" airs Mondays on Bravo.