KUWTK Recap: Kourtney-Kim Fight Sparks Feud Between Kourt and Khloe

The woman behind Nori's Black Book -- a viral parody Instagram account written entirely in the voice of Kim Kardashian's sassy 5-year-old daughter -- is bringing her talents to TooFab.

Each week, "Nori" will be recapping new episodes of "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" and giving us HER take on all the family drama.

(NOTE: The below was not actually written by North West.)

The show featured Kourtney and Kim Kardashian ripping each other to shreds. The girls were violently slapping each other in the face while Khloe and Kendall tried to break them up. Eventually, the two were separated. Khloe was in disbelief that things got to a point where Kourtney and Kim were assaulting each other. Khloe confronted Kourtney about her actions and Kourtney got in her face. Khloe said that it seemed like Kourtney wanted to fight her too and she needed to stop putting her finger in her face. Khloe also said that she would knock Kourtney out, but she doesn't resort to violence.

Kendall checked on Kim and she said she was okay, but wanted Kourtney to leave because she attacked her. Kim was literally bleeding and confused about what just happened. She's said she's not about violence, but she didn't want Kourtney to think she could just attack her and get away with it. Production looked confused as well. Meanwhile, Khloe started to clean the make-up off of her walls from the fight.

KKW Beauty cleans up very easily. This is one of the perks of cheap make-up. - NW

All the girls went back to the bedroom and Kim said Kourtney is the problem, everyone thinks it and she needed to leave. Kourtney fired back by saying that was just Kim's narrative and she never needs to be around any of her sisters. Kim simply responded with "Bye."

Kourtney maintained that Kim and Khloe gang up on her and her attitude is a reflection of their behavior towards her. She said that when she sees Kim and Khloe outside of filming they're completely fine, but not in the filming environment. Kourt thought she had reached her point of not being able to tolerate Kim and Khloe's judgment anymore. She eventually left, but not before yelling "I don't want to be near your fat ass!" at Kim and "Shut the f--k up!” to Khloe, who asked her not to scream because True was sleeping.

Auntie Kourt's language was unacceptable. Have some class about yourself. You're the face of POOSH. Sure, no one reads it now, but one day someone might. Is this really how you want your brand represented? - NW

After Kourtney left, the girls talked about how even though there had been friction between them recently, they were still surprised that Kourtney got so mad. While Kendall cleaned the blood off of Kim from Kourtney scratching her, Kendall said that Kourtney's behavior stemmed from being insecure and losing her mind over her buttons being pushed. Later, Kim and Khloe called Kris, who is in Paris, to tell her about the fight. However, Kris was a little drunk and at a party so she rushed off the phone. Khloe didn't think that Kris took the fight seriously.

If Kris isn't making 10 percent from whatever you're talking about, she's not interested. I once called her to tell her I lost a tooth and she only wanted to know if we could draw up a contract that says she gets 10 percent of whatever the Tooth Fairy left under my pillow. - NW

At Kourtney's house, close family friends Malika and Kadijah Haaq checked in on her to make sure she was okay. They had already spoken to Khloe, but wanted to talk to her too. Kourtney started to cry when she explained that she's being picked on and she was more mad at Khloe than she was at Kim. She expected to fight with Kim, but not Khloe. She felt that Khloe always takes everyone's side except for hers. Malika and Kadijah suggested for her and her sisters to bring a more loving way to speak and in a way that Kourtney doesn't feel disrespected. Kourtney went on to explain that the day of the fight she actually was feeling good, but Kim had an attitude and it was a bad vibe.

She admitted that part of it is her own anxiety about filming this season. She didn't want to miss out on time with her kids and it's not worth it. Kadijah went on to tell her to stop filming and if she needed a break, take a break. Kourtney confessed that she was disappointed in herself and that her response to Kim didn't match Kim's comments. She knew that violence wasn't the answer, but it was just the build up. Kourtney let them know that she and her kids were supposed to be going to Armenia with Kim and her kids, but they weren't speaking at the moment. Malika and Kadijah encouraged her to still go on the trip and to apologize.

The Malikas are so amazing. Not only do they walk my dog, sort my mail, and take copious notes during my meetings, they also give great advice for sister relationships. Sometimes it takes people on the outside looking in to critique the situation. Even if those people are on your payroll. - NW

Back at Khloe's house, Kim updated Scott and Khloe on her talk with Kourtney. Kourtney said she was having a nervous breakdown, she's unhappy and she felt like she just lost it. Kourtney apologized for getting physical. Kim said that Kourtney was angry at Khloe, but took it out on her. Khloe thought it was irresponsible for Kourtney to have these feelings towards her but attacked Kim, so she texted Kourtney and asked her if she wanted to talk. Kim and Kourt agreed to put the drama aside and go to Armenia.

In Paris, Kris received a text from Kylie's assistant informing her that Kylie was absolutely too sick to go to Paris and she had to go to the hospital. Kris started to freak out because they made a commitment and a lot of money had been spent. She had no idea what she was going to say to Balmain. She felt horrible and wanted to cry, but Corey said they need to get into damage control ASAP.

Most people would be disturbed that Kris was more concerned about the business deal than she was about the health of her own daughter. I'm sure those people have never and will never ink a million dollar deal with a high-end fashion brand. I'm also sure those people are Auntie Kourt. - NW

In Armenia, Kim and Kourt planned to baptize their kids, meet with the president of Armenia to bring awareness to the Armenian genocide, and Kim had to do press. When they left their hotel, Kourtney was surprised there were so many fans waiting to see them outside. She loves her fans, but because Kourtney was jet lagged and the recent drama she was hoping for a more low key trip.

Considering she didn't pay for a thing, it's interesting Auntie Kourt had all these expectations. - NW

In Paris, Kris was still upset that Kylie was unable to come to Paris. Corey said that she sounded like a momager and she needed to kick into "mommy mode." He said she needed to call Kylie and comfort her. Kris agreed and decided to focus on how to make it okay with Balmain.

Back in Armenia, Kim and Kourtney took their kids to the Armenian Genocide Memorial, which is a sacred place to honor those who died. Kim was excited to go with Kourtney, since she's already been with Khloe. Kourtney was getting annoyed and overwhelmed with the swarms of press and the lack of privacy during the visit. She was also very jet lagged.

This is why we can't bring non-famous people into our world. They're not used to the attention. It can be overwhelming to go from being ignored, pushed out of the way to being photographed and mobbed. Auntie Kourt and the Disick kids just aren't ready for our life. - NW

The day of the Balmain show in Paris, Kris chatted with actress Eva Longoria about how upset Kylie was when she realized she wasn't able to be in Paris. Kris was devastated for her. However, Balmain was great about it and the art director that stepped in really knew what she was doing. Considering all things that could've gone wrong, everything went well and the show was amazing.

I don't know one person who saw this show and I have a lot of friends in the fashion industry. Did this show even happen? - NW

At Kendall's house, Khloe read a text she sent to Kourtney asking her to have a conversation. Nine hours later Kourtney sent a text back not answering Khloe's question, but sent a video of the private plane she was on. Kendall said that Kourtney doesn't have self awareness and she can't say when she's wrong. After Scott showed up to the house, Kendall added that she thinks that Kourtney's breakup with Scott mentally messed her up and she never dealt with it. Scott disagreed and felt that Kourtney feels misunderstood. He knew that Kourtney meant well and wanted to be on good terms with everybody, it just doesn't always come out that way.

Of course Auntie Kourt is messed up. She and Scott broke up and then he started dating someone who's young enough to probably be dating Mason instead. How does one recover from that? - NW

On their way to meet with the President of Armenia, Kourtney expressed to Kim that even though she loves to travel she was miserable in Armenia and the visit to the Armenian Genocide Memorial was so unenjoyable because of all of the people around. Kim agreed it's annoying, but she felt it's important for people to get a photo of her at the memorial. Kourtney went on to say she doesn't like being a "celebrity." Kim was disappointed in Kourtney's attitude especially since this trip was not a vacation and the point of it was to bring awareness to Armenian genocide and get it recognized by the United States. After dinner with the President, Kourtney finally realized why the trip was so important.

"Celebrity" was a bold choice of words for Auntie Kourt to use.

Mommy and I made it very clear to Auntie Kourt that the trip to Armenia was not one of leisure, so why the attitude? We had press, conferences, and meetings. Some of us have to work and don't get to hang out on Tumblr all day and call it POOSH. - NW

Later, Kourtney and Kim baptized their kids at the oldest church in the world. At the last minute Kim and Kourtney decided to get baptized as well.

I suggested an exorcism for the Disick kids. A baptism isn't strong enough. - NW

After the Armenian trip, Kourtney and Khloe had a talk with Malika and Kadija as the mediators. Kim was there as a spectator. Khloe said that she didn't feel like she could be herself with Kourtney and if she didn't give Kourt what she wanted, she blew up at her. They immediately started arguing and Kourtney started crying. Malika and Kadijah said there were too many jabs and they needed to bring the love back in. The girls eventually made a pact to be mindful of how everyone communicates. Khloe felt good about the conversation.

At the end of the episode, Kourtney decided to take a big step back from filming and said she will pick what she allows the cameras to follow. Going forward, she will be filming only things that excite her, like her appearance at a green conference. She wanted to take back her schedule so she could plan her time of being a mom. She wants to feel fulfilled and happy.

This is all karma. Remember when Auntie Kourt didn't want to let me have my 1st birthday party at her house when me and my family were in between mansions? Well, when you do clownery, the clown comes back to bite.

The network's HR did not appreciate Auntie Kourt's behavior and wanted her off the show completely. I pleaded with the producers to let her stay on in some capacity because she has kids and a struggling website. She needs some form of income and she and her little monsters aren't moving in with us.