"It's all bullshit," he told the interviewer. "GQ wouldn't hit me up if I didn't recently get engaged to a super-famous person. Nobody gives a shit, you know what I mean?"
"Up until about two months ago, if someone wrote about me, I saw it," he added. "Nobody gave a shit two months ago, so anytime there was an article, I would obviously see it because my mom would send it to me and be like, 'Yaaay!'"
The comedian -- who has not yet grown accustomed to the spotlight or to the constant buzz of paparazzi -- popped the question with a $93,000 pear-shaped diamond in mid-June after just a few weeks of dating. And while some people thought, "Whoa, that was fast!" Davidson said it actually happened even faster.
"The day I met her, I was like, 'Hey, I'll marry you tomorrow,'" he explained. "She was calling my bluff. I sent her a picture [of engagement rings]. I was like, 'Do you like any of these?' She was like, 'Those are my favorite ones,' and I was like, 'Sick.'"
Regarding that constant buzz of paparazzi, the New York native said, "They're not waiting for me."
Davidson and Grande recently moved into a massive Manhattan apartment that reportedly cost $16 million. According to Davidson, she bought the place, so he stocks the fridge.
"She's really sweet. She's like, 'This is our house,' and I'm like, 'You're very nice for saying that. Thank you for letting me stay here,'" he joked. "She's like, 'We're getting married!' And I'm like, 'I know, thank you for letting me stay here.'"
Davidson said he and his 24-year-old fiancée were "having a really fun time" while "learning how to be adults."
"It's like, we have six beanbags, but we have no forks -- you know what I mean?" he joked.
Until he and Grande officially tie the knot, Davidson knows they will face constant speculation about their wedding plans. Although he said the two have yet to make concrete plans, he assured us hopeless romantics and emotionally invested fans that the nuptials are "definitely going to happen, for sure."
Davidson's dream girl showed up to set toward the end of his interview to pick him up. She buried her face inside his Balenciaga T-shirt, which was draped over his lanky, 6'3" frame.
"The universe works in weird ways," he said. "All I know is that I'm the luckiest guy in the world."