"When I started getting older, I started realizing how queer I really am."
Demi Lovato says she now drinks alcohol and smokes weed in moderation.
In an interview with Glamour for their March cover story, the singer explained why she's decided to change her approach to sobriety. Demi said she no longer uses the substances that caused her 2018 overdose, but was "confused" by the "all-or-nothing" view of sobriety.
The "What Other People Say" singer noted that since she'd been able to "eat without shame" during her eating disorder recovery, she could use the same balanced approach to her sobriety. Demi reached out to her recovery case manager, Charles Cook.
"I called him and was like, 'Something's not right. I'm living one side of my life completely legalizing and this other side following a program that's telling me if I slip up, I'm going to die,'" Demi recalled. "'I think I want to try this balance thing in the substance side of my life too.'"
Although Demi's team was concerned, they told her that she "deserves this opportunity to make that choice for herself."
"So I did," Demi said.
However, the Grammy winner said she doesn't want other people in recovery to think they need to follow her method, stressing that drinking and smoking weed in moderation is her approach and hers only.
"A one-size-fits-all solution does not work for everybody," she explained, later adding, "What I’m encouraging people to do is just make choices for themselves."
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Meanwhile, the "I Love Me" singer also opened up about her short-lived engagement with Max Ehrich, explaining why she felt "a sense of relief" when the relationship ended.
"When I started getting older, I started realizing how queer I really am," Demi said. "This past year, I was engaged to a man and when it didn't work, I was like, 'This is a huge sign.' I thought I was going to spend my life with someone. Now that I wasn't going to, I felt this sense of relief that I could live my truth."
Looking back at her relationship, the Disney Channel alum said she "denied [her] intuition of all the red flags that had popped up."
"I had no one else to blame but myself," Demi explained. "So I was like, 'How am I ever going to trust again?' But really, I was like, 'Bitch, you should have trusted yourself. If you had trusted yourself, you wouldn't have ended up in this position.'"
The "Cool For The Summer" singer -- who has since been exploring her sexuality -- said she believes she's "too queer" to date a cis man.
"I hooked up with a girl and was like, 'I like this a lot more.' It felt better. It felt right," Demi told the magazine. "Some of the guys I was hanging out with -- when it would come time to be sexual or intimate, I would have this kind of visceral reaction. Like, 'I just don't want to put my mouth there.' It wasn't even based on the person it was with. I just found myself really appreciating the friendships of those people more than the romance, and I didn't want the romance from anybody of the opposite sex."
She added, "I know who I am and what I am, but I'm just waiting until a specific timeline to come out to the world as what I am. I'm following my healers' timeline, and I'm using this time to really study and educate myself on my journey and what I'm preparing to do."